Natural Freedom

Well well well I am currently at a beach house in the deep of the night listening to the girl I'm lusting after (not love, fuck never love) making out and possibly about to fuck with my best friend. I am very drunk but my cognitive abilities are more and less intact.

I honestly don't know why I'm posting this on the board. No I perfectly know why. I'm very pissed at my best friend. He really did nothing to hook the girl I'm lusting after. In fact, he is apparently in love with another girl who is very innocent (ligit innocent, I live in an Asian country.) however, after drinking a little (all of us, except the girl and her friends. They're all asleep.) he's suddenly putting all his hands around her and fucking making out with her and all that. Now, I'm not hurt or anything (well, maybe a little, I'm still in high school, my sex drive is so high right now), I'm only slightly pissed at the mystery.

My friend really did barely anything (he's more handsome, way more handsome, than me. Yes, I have a slight inferiority complex towards him. Almost all my friends are merely friends of him. And I'm not even his best friend.). Meanwhile, i also did.... almost absolutely nothing. I was sure she was attracted to me. She was almost always keeping eye contact when I talk to her and touching me often. No im lying, i'd often speak that people would ignore. Gotta stop that habit. I am almost 90% sure i did not exibit any large signs of attracting. However, I also know (observed) that she did the same to my best friend and my other next best friend.

Well they're definitely doing it right now. Oh well, as I said, I'm only lusting after her. Time to learn.

Edit: I'm lying to myself. She's always been attracted to my best friend. It's just that he's never given her a chance to go further until now. I'm only venting right now.

Edit again: they didn't do it. I'm surprised. Shit I'm actually relieved.

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"To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance."
- Oscar Wilde

Well...once you sober up, re-read what you have just written...you've just provided yourself with all of the answers that you seek.

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EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING.

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!

You never have to play second fiddle to anyone.

It's time to embrace the power of being your own best friend and show yourself some respect.

Attraction is not a choice.

The sooner you take the red pill, the better.

Also, stay away from that fucking booze.

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“I learned this, at least, by my experiment; that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours. . . ."

-Thoreau's Walden

@The Kidd!! Rather than seeking answers, I was just looking for confirminations. Like I said, I was just venting out some stress. I don't really care what happens to her now. I'm not going to pay attention to someone that's not interested. Nice to know I can still think properly while intoxicated tho.

@The Pokemon Trainer Let me make a small correction. He's my second best friend. That said, I did make it sound worse than it is. I still have plenty of true friends, tho I'm perfectly fine being alone.

I also wasn't planning on getting drunk. Someone just had to give me a mix of different boozes.

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"To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance."
- Oscar Wilde