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PostPosted: Sat May 12, 2018 3:58 am 
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I think that the original evolutionary conditions lead them to consolidate maximum value for safety, but at the same time acquire the best genes possible by whatever means necessary.

I feel like you would have thought of this already so I am probably missing something. But I view every action including commitment as window dressing to the goal of getting the best genes possible.

I think that the non-paternity rates, which are high enough to shock most people would support this. I agree that this is something that requires a lot of pondering, and I haven't been able to get pry bars underneath parts of it either.

I think part of it, is that women tend group much closer than men do. I've noticed that in school. I tend to be pretty unassuming unless I have a reason to do something. I noticed something interesting there that I hadn't seen before.

Within a couple of days they had rapidly sorted themselves in a hierarchy of attractiveness. I subtly flirted with one of the 3 that formed the top trio. She completely underestimated me, which I thought was interesting, also revealing about how I come off when cloaked.

After the hierarchy formed, the moderately attractive girls would try to get my attention with varying degrees of overtness...some were so overt they took me off guard. As in I held eye contact for a second too long on purpose and they basically swooped in :lol: . I thought it was interesting how quickly they sorted themselves and decided who amongst them would test the waters first.

As time went on more and more attractive girls would hit on me, and the most attractive girls would be behind the scenes telling the others what to do. I saw them do once (they didn't think I would notice) and I could feel their actions shaping the others.

It's gotten to the point where the hottest girl and probably the most attractive I've seen ever is trying to get my attention.And I'm pretty sure she's never broken her poker face in her life, it took her two years to crack. The thing is that I feel like she puts herself under immense pressure to make her life perfect, and it doesn't interest me that much.

The commonality behind all of their movements is that they immediately try to press me for commitment that they've done nothing to deserve, which of course gets met with a inward lol. The thing is that even the not as attractive ones stick to their guns on this.

I've been a master of space on this. In the 2 years we've been together they've never figured out anything about me really. I never say what I'm thinking or feeling or explain why I do something. If there's conflict I get up and leave and never comment on it. I also do contadicitary things on purpose occasionally because I think it's funny.

Tldr:

Maybe the chaos comes from them serving two masters. Maximize genes, but also maximize security but not through commitment to males but by navigating the female hierarchy. In other words maybe it's the same as when men wear suits in the workplace, it says I am playing the same game as you and by the same rules.

This would make sense based on how they tend to operate psychologically. It also adds to the fact that there must be at least two variables because if we assume they want the best genes (which I think is reasonable) and they won't consolidate on someone who is objectively out of their league there must be at least one more factor.

I also find the complicity of males in this charade disheartening. I really believe that we will pay a price we cannot even imagine for their weakness. It shouldn't be this easy to be in the top 10%. It's all fun and games until there is no one left to stand up to the bullies.

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"The heart is deep beyond all things, and it is the man. Even so, who can know him."


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PostPosted: Sat May 12, 2018 11:26 am 
Altair wrote: *

...And I'm pretty sure she's never broken her poker face in her life, it took her two years to crack.
really? is is really her who took years to crack?
Altair wrote:
The commonality behind all of their movements is that they immediately try to press me for commitment that they've done nothing to deserve, which of course gets met with a inward lol. The thing is that even the not as attractive ones stick to their guns on this.
in animal kingdom no female commits to the men, why should they try to do this?


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PostPosted: Sat May 12, 2018 1:31 pm 
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GB: Very apt post, thank you for reminding me of that. It was a good thing you did when you saved those posts. Loving the signature :)
Altair wrote: *
I feel like you would have thought of this already so I am probably missing something.
Carry on Altair, the different view is helping, together with the prods.

I am applying the pry bar to a different corner.
Altair(edited) wrote: *
I view every action as window dressing to the goal of getting the best genes possible.
Agreed
Altair wrote: *
maximize security but not through commitment to males but by navigating the female hierarchy. In other words maybe it's the same as when men wear suits in the workplace, it says I am playing the same game as you and by the same rules.
This, oh so this.

One of my neighbours had her boiler break down on her, this is one who I had previously asked if she had a decent plumber and she replied no, truthfully. The next morning a guy turned up and fixed her boiler, when I asked her about it, she explained that she had mentioned it to someone in her group and they did the rest, the guy phoned her up to arrange the appointment and done.
Pretty much all of the female groups I have been in contact with have a selection of workmen to cover all trades on call, somewhere within the group. Most times my best option is to go ask the female neighbour who is in the highest local group if they have anyone, they will already have been vetted, they will be reliable (else they would have been dropped) and easily contactable. Do this enough and they will put you directly in contact with the person who 'manages' that tradesman in the group.
I often find these tradesmen do not advertise, as they get enough work from the group(s) not to have to, they also want to do a better job, as it is a recommend and they are usually cheaper (not crap cheap, good cheaper).
The female groups also trade and share tradesmen, in return for other things (status changes, collaborations etc)

I have had a few occasions where I have seperately called up the tradesman in question to be told they are too busy etc and there is a wait.. only to have the same person recommended to me by the group and magically they are available all of a sudden :)

They very much trade and exchange access to value in return for status changes within the group and across groups.
Altair wrote: *
I think that the original evolutionary conditions lead them to consolidate maximum value for safety
Altair(edited) wrote: *
and acquire the best genes possible by whatever means necessary.

I think there is some confusion here, as males tend to confuse the value/security thing and the gene hunt and mix them together. I am thinking more and more they are totally seperate things.

Any seeming join between the two was brought about by society and its rules and boundaries over the years, not that it stuck, it just looked like it did from certain angles. In a sense we are now seeing the unravelling of that.

The problem was the females that stepped outside the rules were kept in check by the rest of the females, if we have to do this, so do you. That is not the case anymore as the rules are going/gone. Crab bucket mentality.
Altair wrote: *
In other words maybe it's the same as when men wear suits in the workplace, it says I am playing the same game as you and by the same rules.
Exactly.

Your example with the groups in school is very appropriate and thank you for posting that.

I would say that they have sorted themselves in terms of value, attractiveness being the most outward sign of that, possibly the most important in relation to relating to males.

As you noted, they are very careful to not give you more value than you think you are worth, also so they do not get less than they think they are worth.

Hence they start testing with middle value, to see if you bite (I could argue they started lower than you think they did). Is that where you think you sit?
Then when that fails, they gradually move up the scale, each time the whole group is learning from the interactions.

So, they have made an initial guesstimate as to where you think you are.. They they send someone who they think matches that, to see if they are correct. The way that interaction goes tells them if they aimed too high, too low or about right. It also gives them a lot of feedback.

As you saw, those at the top did not put themselves on the line, they threw the sacrificial lambs under the truck first. Yet they learnt as much from the interactions as those who were in front of you did.

It was not about any one girl, it was all about figuring out where you think you stand and learning how they can handle you.

If they already knew where you stand, if they had already assesed you, they would not have to go through this dance.

Altair wrote: *
The commonality behind all of their movements is that they immediately try to press me for commitment that they've done nothing to deserve
This I see as them asking you 'is this enough? is this enough to get you to offer your commitment?', a way of assessing where you think your value lies on the scale.

Not to say they want it, or would take it, are you willing to offer it and how much value do you expect in return?

They are not seeking the commitment, they are seeing at what point you will offer it.

The way society, the rules, the boundaries have been put together and the way males thought/think and have been conditioned, I think males put way too much on commitment (on both sides), the females know this and have worked out how to utilise that.

I am thinking they are using the males willingness to offer commitment as a measure of his own internal value.
Altair wrote: *
The thing is that even the not as attractive ones stick to their guns on this.
Yep.

As you notice, they cannot decide themselves where your value lies, else it would have been worked out on that first meeting of the middle value female who was fed to the lion. So they have to keep trying to get more of a handle on you.

Purely observing you did not work either, they had to interact with you. So they did, or their representative(s) did.

This will continue until they are happy they have you in a box somewhere with a label on it.
Altair wrote: *
The thing is that I feel like she puts herself under immense pressure to make her life perfect, and it doesn't interest me that much..
She will feel this, the others will feel it also.

She will not know why she feels this, she will feel it.
Altair wrote: *
I also find the complicity of males in this charade disheartening. I really believe that we will pay a price we cannot even imagine for their weakness.
I feel we are starting to see that, I am curious and fearful of where it will lead.
Altair wrote: *
It shouldn't be this easy to be in the top 10%.
The sad thing is, it is.

_________________
In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.


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PostPosted: Sat May 12, 2018 3:53 pm 
Can selfcentered / selfabsorbed individuals who hate each other to the bone form a group?


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PostPosted: Sat May 12, 2018 11:18 pm 
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Midas wrote: *
Can selfcentered / selfabsorbed individuals who hate each other to the bone form a group?
I find myself going 'what' again.. Whatever you are trying to say, it is not coming across.

enlighten us as to why you have asked this question and what you hope us all to gain from the answer?

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In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.


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PostPosted: Sun May 13, 2018 4:37 am 
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I try to think of things in terms of how they would have been advantageous in a hunter gatherer situation. Women doing more bartering would make more sense, that would also explain why men tend to be more straightforward. Imagine trying to take down large game with their tactics :lol:

I wonder if they're trying to get me to participate in being a number on a Rolodex.
Quote:
I think there is some confusion here, as males tend to confuse the value/security thing and the gene hunt and mix them together. I am thinking more and more they are totally seperate things.

Any seeming join between the two was brought about by society and its rules and boundaries over the years, not that it stuck, it just looked like it did from certain angles. In a sense we are now seeing the unravelling of that.

The problem was the females that stepped outside the rules were kept in check by the rest of the females, if we have to do this, so do you. That is not the case anymore as the rules are going/gone. Crab bucket mentality.
Yeah, I think you're right. They'll still be psychologically primed to try to get security from some guy while they chase after alphas though. I still view it as one strategy, get the best genes possible. But since the best genes rarely exist in the best provider their strategy operates under the default of lock one guy down and be open to better options.
Quote:
Your example with the groups in school is very appropriate and thank you for posting that.
Watching them start from ground zero form a hierarchy and gain control of their environment has been very interesting, something of a master's degree in game. It's good to have extra minds to try to decipher their movements.
Quote:
Hence they start testing with middle value, to see if you bite (I could argue they started lower than you think they did). Is that where you think you sit?
Well, there were a lot of subtle looks around the classrooms while they took everything in. I was also making observational notes on everyone. I probably mentally discarded any info on any of them I wasn't interested in sleeping with.

I was very drawn to one of the original trio, there's something about her that catches my attention. Like a similar musical note, anyways I probed a little bit to see how she would react. I talked to her on one of the field trips, and walked with her between stations. She distanced herself so I let it go.

Within the week the middle value ones started probing me aggressively. I would hold eye contact just a split second too long or something small. They would make a much bigger movement though, like if they sat on the other side of the classroom the next class they would be two seats aside from my side. It wasn't perfectly linear though, there was one girl that was less attractive then them who made a half hearted pass at me after.

Actually funnily enough they eventually formed little groups that would commander my preferred seats. Rather then try to show up earlier I just picked a different spot that I liked. Then after a little bit, long enough to not appear suspicious (except it was) they were sitting behind me and a different group took the spot that I was in before.

Several months later I ran into the girl from the trio in a street party. She tried to catch my eye and it felt like she was filled with regret about how much she had underestimated me. It felt like she thought she had blown it and was desperate to get me to be approving of her. I was nice to her but we only talked for a moment.

There's been times that they have crossed me, sometimes it's from only thinking of themselves, but others it has a different flavour. They've done it in ways to gauge my reaction. It will feel more directed, which is interesting because the level of overtness indicates how deeply they think I am perceiving the situation. They're still in chaos about how perceptive I am being and they are still missing the mark which is also funny.

But anyways, of the half a dozen skirmishes I've entered I've left every one with more power consolidated because I never reveal my emotions/thoughts and don't react to attacks or probes. I just go about my life, and when I run into them next the intensity of their emotion and wanting attention can surprise me.

I also find it curious that they are so willing to be sacrifical lambs, I'd say "no you do it".

If attention is being in the spotlight, then perhaps being paid attention to is a way of ensuring people notice quickly if something happens to you. Ie. A wild animal invades the camp. If this is true then maybe it's valued more highly than an immediate opportunity to get good genes (if the man lives there - no scarcity). Violating the agreed rule set would get you kicked out of the group.
Quote:
They are not seeking the commitment, they are seeing at what point you will offer it.
I've run my game as well as I can, it may not be enough, but I have nothing left to give. I have decided to follow through in the name of science. I am very curious if they will break rank, next year I graduate.
Quote:
This will continue until they are happy they have you in a box somewhere with a label on it.
They're very persistent, but so far they've had about as much luck as one would have herding cats. It's not even like I am invincible, I have weak points but they are looking in all the wrong areas. Men like nice women, and women like hard to control men we project our desires onto the other and then wonder why no one is happy.
Quote:
I feel we are starting to see that, I am curious and fearful of where it will lead.


I desperately do not want to be under the roof of the temple when we find out. I'm working very hard to make a location independent income.

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PostPosted: Sun May 13, 2018 6:27 am 
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Midas wrote: *
Can selfcentered / selfabsorbed individuals who hate each other to the bone form a group?
If the need is great enough sure, also commitment (regardless of who it comes from) is very important with humans most of all because of how long children are dependent for.

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PostPosted: Sun May 13, 2018 12:02 pm 
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I will come back to your main post Altair, lots of good points.

Let me propose a thought experiment:
Altair wrote: *
I try to think of things in terms of how they would have been advantageous in a hunter gatherer situation.
Altair wrote: *
They'll still be psychologically primed to try to get security from some guy while they chase after alphas though. I still view it as one strategy, get the best genes possible. But since the best genes rarely exist in the best provider their strategy operates under the default of lock one guy down and be open to better options.
Altair wrote: *
maximize security but not through commitment to males but by navigating the female hierarchy.
peregrinus wrote: *
I think there is some confusion here, as males tend to confuse the value/security thing and the gene hunt and mix them together. I am thinking more and more they are totally seperate things.

Any seeming join between the two was brought about by society and its rules and boundaries over the years, not that it stuck, it just looked like it did from certain angles.
Throw away the gene hunt temporarily.
(if you want to, assume they captured the genes and a bun is baking in the oven)

Taking the above, let the 'lock one guy' aspect come from society (religion, social pressure, conformity, virginity and sex etc). In a sense they were only left with one option by the way things were structured. So this part is not an innate drive, it is an adaptation.

So, remove the 'lock one guy' down part... then see where your mind takes you.

What would be in their best interests survival, security and access to value wise?

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In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.


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PostPosted: Sun May 13, 2018 12:34 pm 
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Altair wrote: *
They're very persistent, but so far they've had about as much luck as one would have herding cats. It's not even like I am invincible, I have weak points but they are looking in all the wrong areas..
They are looking where they have them, not where you have them. Also where they have found them in other males.

[I would say more often than not, if you take what they try on hardest, that is exactly their weakest point]
Altair wrote: *
I've run my game as well as I can, it may not be enough, but I have nothing left to give.
Less is more. You have to give nothing.
Quote:
They are not seeking the commitment, they are seeing at what point you will offer it.
Really, if you take their game, the winning move is never to offer your commitment. Once you offer it, they know how you value it, i.e. what will get you to offer it.. The game is then over, box and label time.
Altair wrote: *
I also find it curious that they are so willing to be sacrifical lambs, I'd say "no you do it".
They are not doing it for themselves, so it is not on them.
They gain status within the group, in various ways from doing it.
The first one is the teller really, after that all the others know you are not below a certain value when they approach, so in effect their risk is lessened a lot.
Going back to your hunter gatherer comment, think of the implications back then with a strange male.

Altair wrote: *
There's been times that they have crossed me, sometimes it's from only thinking of themselves, but others it has a different flavour. They've done it in ways to gauge my reaction. It will feel more directed, which is interesting because the level of overtness indicates how deeply they think I am perceiving the situation.
There are precious gems in these words.
Altair wrote: *
She tried to catch my eye and it felt like she was filled with regret about how much she had underestimated me.
Regret or fustration or puzzlement or intrique or bait. Who knows.
Know that you are not some project that has ended in her mind.

Altair(Assorted quotes) wrote: *
She distanced herself so I let it go.
Within the week the middle value ones started probing me aggressively.
Rather then try to show up earlier I just picked a different spot that I liked.
They've done it in ways to gauge my reaction.
I never reveal my emotions/thoughts and don't react to attacks or probes.
I just go about my life, and when I run into them next the intensity of their emotion and wanting attention can surprise me.
They're very persistent
I wonder if they're trying to get me to participate in being a number on a Rolodex.
.
They are seeing if you will volunteer to be on that rolodex and write your name there yourself.. and what level of bait it will take to get you to do it.

_________________
In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.


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PostPosted: Sun May 13, 2018 1:25 pm 
peregrinus wrote: *


enlighten us as to why you have asked this question and what you hope us all to gain from the answer?

i wonder why you asked the question this way
.
not very nice..


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PostPosted: Sun May 13, 2018 1:33 pm 
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Midas wrote: *
i wonder why you asked the question this way
.
not very nice..
:lol:

If you are on this forum for being nice, you are in the wrong place
This place is about maximising your potential, and often it involves beign uncomfrotable as fuck or in pain
So get of your ass and do some work ffs :( You try to look as you have your shit together but you don't


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PostPosted: Sun May 13, 2018 4:46 pm 
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A little gem from Patrice ?
Quote:
Patrice played a bouncer in the Spike Lee movie 25th Hour, and he, as well as some of the other main actors, was present at the ADR session. After the session was over, people lingered and talked outside of the studio. A few women, including my roommate, gravitated towards this very large loquacious man. Following behind my very social roommate, I found myself in a cipher that would change my life forever. It was a Tuesday, and Patrice, the center of attention, was inviting all of the women in this cipher to his Friday show at Caroline’s on Broadway, where he would be doing stand-up comedy. He directly invited everyone—except me. I did not quite understand why, but I spoke up and said, “Well, why can’t I come?” with my best ghetto girl voice and sassy attitude. He blew his breath and said, “I guess you can come if you come with her (referring to my roommate) since I already invited her, and I suppose she was gonna bring you anyway, unfortunately." 1 did not understand why I was receiving the cold shoulder from this stranger, since it did not appear as if he knew any of the other females any more than he knew me. So what was the problem? What did I do?
Curiosity, as they say, kills the cat, and I not only went to his show that Friday at Caroline’s on Broadway, I also began to hang around him any chance I got thereafter. Time passed, and he eventually explained to me that he did not like me the first day he met me because I had what he considered “pretty girl syndrome.” Pretty girl syndrome is basically a sense of entitlement that he felt most woman carried around with them (mostly) subconsciously. Considering his prior experiences with really attractive women, he said that sense of entitlement was usually topped off with unbearable amount of arrogance that left most of them unlikeable and confusingly single. He felt that I had an extreme case of pretty girl syndrome and that he was going to do for me what no other man in my life had ever done before; instead of trying to have sex with me, he would become a real friend and teach me a thing or two about men. He wanted to be my mentor and teach me how to “rise above my vagina and my prettiness.” He said that if I wanted people, especially men, to see my value as a woman, then I had to become more valuable than my physicality. I had no clue what he meant by all of this at first. I thought he was insane and presumptuous, considering he did not know me very well. Besides, in my mind, I had all of these wonderful qualities as a woman that he had yet to see. I later found that he did see my value and potential, but he also saw my resentment, bitterness, pain, and lack of direction. Although we eventually became lovers, which contradicted part of his initial intent, he still did exactly what he intended to do with my mind. Over a ten-year period, I kept an open mind and heart while Patrice imbued me with priceless knowledge through the use of brutal honesty and severe patience. He started this training, if you will, by explaining to me the natural order of men and woman and why he felt today’s women were at a loss for happiness.
Von DeCarlo - Speak Fluent Man: The Top Things Women Should Consider Before Blaming The Man

PS : I have the book in odt, epub and pdf format.
I'm currently seeing with Grinus if I can put it in text format here in a couple of posts. But feel free to request it :)

PS2 : And another one
Quote:
However, Patrice was not interested in having me get my way with him emotionally without good reason and expressed communication beyond feelings. His mission to get me (and every other woman he came across) to think outside of the box stayed consistent the entire time I knew him. He said that he felt it was a man’s responsibility to give women "different options on how to think” and felt that it was a disservice to women whenever a man would just submit to a woman’s demands and not make her work diligently at justifying why she felt any particular way.
GATEKEEPER OF VALUE !

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Alvin Toffler


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PostPosted: Sun May 13, 2018 5:08 pm 
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@Goldenboy

Holy fucking shit that bolded part. God bless Patrice. Why the fuck did that motherfucker have to die ?


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PostPosted: Sun May 13, 2018 5:40 pm 
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Some girls are beautiful , others are very beautiful.


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PostPosted: Sun May 13, 2018 6:08 pm 
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peregrinus wrote: *
So, remove the 'lock one guy' down part... then see where your mind takes you.

What would be in their best interests survival, security and access to value wise?
Oh of course forge as many alliances as possible with people who could protect you

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PostPosted: Sun May 13, 2018 6:33 pm 
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peregrinus wrote: *
Less is more. You have to give nothing.
This is the next area of work, I'm moving on from shadow integration for a while. I've had several dreams of a large black dog sleeping peacefully beside me. So I think we're good there.

The next step is to become as empty and formless as possible. I deactivated my Facebook a while ago and have no other social media. So that's a huge source of potential info gone, From here it's all in my head.

peregrinus wrote: *
Really, if you take their game, the winning move is never to offer your commitment. Once you offer it, they know how you value it, i.e. what will get you to offer it.. The game is then over, box and label time.
peregrinus wrote: *
They are seeing if you will volunteer to be on that rolodex and write your name there yourself.. and what level of bait it will take to get you to do it.
Whenever I've engaged with them they push for unconditional surrender. Especially the higher up ones that fronted first, when they start to come around a little, they just expect that you'll stroll into their camp and willingly disarm yourself.

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PostPosted: Sun May 13, 2018 11:17 pm 
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Altair wrote: *
they just expect that you'll stroll into their camp and willingly disarm yourself.
I know, its amusing in some ways.. I do enjoy the look on their faces when you dont and they cannot figure out why.
fufe wrote: *
Holy fucking shit that bolded part. God bless Patrice.
I have to agree with this..

And then we come to GoldenBoy, who has been off prospecting and has come back with some gems to show us. Bravo.
That PS2, that resonates with me a lot.
The main quote, I am sure I have read/heard that before somewhere, it rings bells, which is not surprising. It is beautiful, simply beautiful.

I feel this part also : I later found that he did see my value and potential, but he also saw my resentment, bitterness, pain, and lack of direction.

She says : Although we eventually became lovers, which contradicted part of his initial intent,
It did not..

If anything you could say he helped transform her into someone he did want to sleep with.

That book sounds like one to read, had not come across it before..

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PostPosted: Mon May 14, 2018 12:09 am 
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Altair wrote:
The commonality behind all of their movements is that they immediately try to press me for commitment that they've done nothing to deserve, which of course gets met with a inward lol. The thing is that even the not as attractive ones stick to their guns on this.

What do they in this case to press you to commit, are they asking you to marriage them?, or some kind of social agreement?.

How do they do it?, on paper?, verbally?, physically?

Quote:
I think that the original evolutionary conditions lead them to consolidate maximum value for safety, but at the same time acquire the best genes possible by whatever means necessary.
Do genetics can be affected or improved?, how does commitment can help to attain the best genes.?.


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PostPosted: Mon May 14, 2018 10:06 am 
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rant wrote: *
how does commitment can help to attain the best genes.?.
Commitment per se does not directly help to attain the best genes. It does vastly improve the chances of those genes surviving and prospering, once captured.

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In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.


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PostPosted: Mon May 14, 2018 4:26 pm 
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Message sent to the people participating on the forum.
Sorry if I missed you. :D

Her point of view is quite illuminating. Really interesting book.

Thanks for the Bravo Grinus :ugeek:

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