This girl just FriendZoned me LOL!
Why I comment this, because I think is relevant to releasing and allowing it. At least for me this theme is surrounded by some pain and anxiety because of all the stupid beliefs I collected when I was "studiying game", and this gives me the oportunity, real time, to really digg and examine all that weird #beliefs, and get to that elements more quickly, then learning to untangle and squash them or in the best case incorporate them into my system in a more "benefical way", I think this is called learning from your past. This is actually a good thing for me to have happened. Not trying to be all Zen and shit, but I'm learning to see the workings of the universe more clearly: The best lessons are learned the hard way, or the hard way makes you learn the best lessons, something like that.
The thing started like this: She got mad because with me, because I wasn't messaging her or responding her text messages, and send me this BIG BIG big angry face in Facebook, telling me that why do I keep ignoring her.
And right of the bat I said to her:
- You see, you have your boyfriend,... what do you want from me, why do you keep messaging me so insistently when I don't reach for you anymore? (I know exactly what she is obtaining from me, not gonna give that for free anymore)
And I continued with something like: Let me tell you this, I really like you, but you are with your partner and I don't want to interfere with that, don't really want to mess with that. Not my style, and I'm not a beggar for attention or company.
Then she said: I thought we were Friends... (I don't know, nor have any friends this needy wanting to know how I am, like daily) ...
So I said something like: I haven't had, nor did I need girl friends, so no need for any of them right now, sorry.
Because I desire you I cannot see you as a friend, so I think it's best if we stop messaging altogether.
So I just cut all convos with her via FB, right then and there.
Self note: Like... I don't know anyone who gets mad because you are friends with them and not message so often, ignore, etc. All woman want attention
, I think is an Aphorism coined by The Kidd!!
Also, not because a woman gives you attention, she desires you. But here's the strange thing, before that she told me she keeps dreaming with me, thinking of me, and said it to me via Watsapp, all that shit. I guess she can't keep me out of her mind, or so it seems (she told me, various times this dreams, and reported her dreams and how I interacted in them) So in her subconscious department I guess I'm a big room, not shure if it's a sexy room, but I ocuppy space "there"
@Feelings and realeasing, by being but in that dreaded zone, summary:
I failed to escalate with her early on, was a puss, Ya'I know sorry.
I guess that's why she geolocated me in that zone
. You live and learn.
It actually feels funny being put in that category, never had that in my life before
. There's always a first time for everything. I say it feels funny because all the guys I've asked this question, they report me they feel like shit, like *not valid as a man*, and this kind of "worst" feelings a man can have when a girl put them in that category, I'm sincerely not. I can say this because I did the realeasing of my feelings for her, much much before I actually had the nerve to say her that I liked her, it just felt for me like a necesary step. Learning to crawl before you learn to run.
Right after she texted this to me, I was actually forcing some feelings internally to feel "not like a man" or something like that... but
, nada. I guess I feel this neutral because I'm not obtaining my identity from her, I just had a desire for a girl and the repository of that desire didn't wan't me back, also it's not like the first time it happens to me
It's just that, I guess I can think this logically because I allowed the emotions to flow fully when I needed.