Nice Flow.
I don't know man. I can't get to some sex and intimacy issues I have. How long does it usually take for change to be noticeable ? After all I've done around all this inner work and these 2 days trying to trigger/allow, I feel hardly even a little bit closer.
Also, why inquire if the thing has been allowed fully ? I thought that's only thing you have to do and the thing will solve itself or something.
I can't even imagine allowing and inquiring at the same time lol
My biggest problem is, that when I don't think about things so much, I can actually do a lot in all areas in life (When people are around, it defocuses my mind from self-analyzing, so that's why I'm better wiht people around) - Problem is when I think k about stuff, then I shut down immeadetelly.
Altho, I have been succesfull with releasing some very dark, opressive and depressive thoughts/beliefs/emotions/whothehellknows with inquiry ONLY so... I will try that a lot now, with focus.. Which is pretty damn hardest thing for me, to focus my thoughts and emotions
![Laughing :lol:](./images/smilies/icon_lol.gif)
Fufe. You're going about this wrong.
trying to trigger
You don't try to trigger. Triggering is something that happens. Something occurs (a thought, an experience, a situation, something somebody says to you, etc) and that triggers feelings/thoughts to come up that don't feel good (anger, fear, numbness, apathy, discouragement, lack, wanting, insufficiency, depression, etc).
How long does it usually take for change to be noticeable ?
these 2 days trying to trigger/allow, I feel hardly even a little bit closer.
the thing will solve itself
Thats not what allowing is about. Its not about solving anything, or about bringing about a certain specific change or outcome that you think is supposed to happen. Its NOT goal directed.
If you're trying to get rid of something, if you don't accept some part of yourself, if you're pushing away a piece of you, then you are definitely not allowing. When you say things like "I hardly feel closer" or "how long will it take to change things" then you are automatically dis-allowing.
Like Flow says, allowing is stepping into the experience 100% with no story, no labels, no judgements, no criticisms, no wanting things to be different than they are, no resistance.
Also, why inquire if the thing has been allowed fully ? I thought that's only thing you have to do and the thing will solve itself or something.
I can't even imagine allowing and inquiring at the same time
I never said anything about allowing and inquiring at the same time, and I would not suggest trying to do that. Its get triggered, allow, and then inquire.
The inquiring is useful because it can often help you uncover deeper things that also trigger you. So maybe you have a bad experience with a girl that triggers you, then you sit with the feelings and welcome them fully and allow them, and once you feel at peace with the negative feelings, then you can ask yourself why that particular interaction triggered you the way it did. Maybe you inquire on it, and you realize that you have some deeper issues with the way your mom treated you growing up, and just doing the inquiry triggers some of those emotions about your childhood and your mom. Then you can allow those emotions too, and you can continue to inquire deeper. The inquiry allows you to investigate things deeper and deeper and get to more fundamental and pervasive issues faster.