So, recently I started at a new work, where I met a "friend" who I've known way back from school.
Background: he used to bully me a lot (often racially) and he often had backup. He is a witty guy and can get many to laugh with him when he is making fun of you. Needless to say, I was very weak at that time.
Anyway, some years have gone since, and I know genuinely believe that I should treat people accordingly, but on the next level. Like if someone messes with me, it's okay to mess them up.
So, now, I meet him every day at work, and he does start to irritate me, jokingly busting my balls etc. I had already decided that, if/when he goes too far, I'll set him straight.
So, one day, he was still making fun of me and the other colleague was also laughing. I tried to ignore it, until he jokingly hit me on my back head and then I completely lost it. I hit him with my elbow in his stomach. I turned around, and he was still smiling, though kind of sad and looking down. So I slapped him, just to show him I was serious. He looks up, shocked. I still kept eye contact. Then he just walked away.
Next day, he said sorry and has been behaving very nice ever since.
What would you guys have done? I feel like, there are 3 levels. Someone messes with you, and:
1: You are too weak/"nice" to do something about it.
2: It affects you, and you answer accordingly.
3: It doesn't affect you (indifference), and then you can choose whether you will do something or not.
Bottom line is, I am happy with myself
, but still kind of bummed out that I wasn't on level 3 in this particular situation. For some reason, I wasn't as witty as him and our history definitely could have been a trigger. Anyway, this and other sitautions have shown me that I can have a big ego, sometimes it feels good to let it control me.
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