Natural Freedom

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 16, 2016 6:38 pm 
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Slim Titan wrote:
You can make a move yourself too. You don't have to "wait". Just stack evidence and look for signs then approach. The better ones will front more but they'll breakdown eventually.

Maybe you should research the keyword "proactive" on the forum. There are a couple threads laying around especially one that Grinus posted about different approaches women make.


I'm well aware of those, when I say they don't make any moves there's not enough evidence for me to go with. I don't usually respond to anything that requires me making any effort in this regard.

I've decided to get a vasectomy soon as I save up for it, this way I definitely never have to worry about getting them pregnant when they fuck things up.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 17, 2016 10:29 am 
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You're going to keep repeating the same stuff if you don't address the core issues.

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PostPosted: Sun Dec 18, 2016 12:18 am 
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TheDude wrote:
You're going to keep repeating the same stuff if you don't address the core issues.


I've been digging deep for years dude, 10 years and counting.

I've looked at the core issues under a microscope and analysed it to fuck.

I've had those hard conversations with myself, admitting to myself things I didn't like, all that shit, rinse and repeat for a decade.

At some point you gotta say fuck it and live your life, I've had enough.

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"Simply put, you being in her life is a BLESSING. Her wronging you in any way is her own self-inflicted CURSE, and if she does wrong you, then let the punishment fit the crime. Her life will absolutely SUCK without you."


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 18, 2016 2:08 am 
Alchemist wrote:
Slim Titan wrote:
You can make a move yourself too. You don't have to "wait". Just stack evidence and look for signs then approach. The better ones will front more but they'll breakdown eventually.

Maybe you should research the keyword "proactive" on the forum. There are a couple threads laying around especially one that Grinus posted about different approaches women make.


I'm well aware of those, when I say they don't make any moves there's not enough evidence for me to go with. I don't usually respond to anything that requires me making any effort in this regard.

I've decided to get a vasectomy soon as I save up for it, this way I definitely never have to worry about getting them pregnant when they fuck things up.


Just a thought. Kudos to getting a vasectomy. Save up a fair amount of juice though if you want to have kids later. You may change your mind.

I'm surprised they haven't made moves though. A fair amount of the time when I go to bars or areas where I'm enjoying myself with friends plenty of women are making moves. Then again, you may mean in your social circle. If that's the case then they'll be quite content in playing the waiting game.

Never hurts to go on low information outside of your social circles though especially if it's at bars. they won't know if you're ever coming back :lol: . The worst that will happen after you say hi is that they'll front or better yet they'll open up. If you know them deeper then definitely wait because the repercussions can hurt you.

Women love playing, "the most dangerous game."

edit: hope you had a laugh if you realized the book title. :mrgreen:


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 18, 2016 3:04 am 
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Yeah I've been advised to save my baby juice already but right now I dont see myself ever meeting anyone that I'd want to have kids with.

I'm done with relationships for good so what kind of arrangement would we have. :lol:

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"Simply put, you being in her life is a BLESSING. Her wronging you in any way is her own self-inflicted CURSE, and if she does wrong you, then let the punishment fit the crime. Her life will absolutely SUCK without you."


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 18, 2016 4:54 am 
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Alchemist wrote:
TheDude wrote:
You're going to keep repeating the same stuff if you don't address the core issues.


I've been digging deep for years dude, 10 years and counting.

I've looked at the core issues under a microscope and analysed it to fuck.

I've had those hard conversations with myself, admitting to myself things I didn't like, all that shit, rinse and repeat for a decade.

At some point you gotta say fuck it and live your life, I've had enough.


"Fuck it" is a LOT closer to the experience of emotional releasing.

To analyze something under a microscope you have to hold onto it.

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PostPosted: Sun Dec 18, 2016 8:30 am 
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Quote:
Intellectualizing vs. Awareness

“Here is the catch though: if the awareness is purely intellectual, if it doesn’t come with the deep pain
that comes with emotional awareness, then it’s not true awareness. It’s actually another defense mechanism
in disguise called intellectualization, and it’s actually a pseudo self-awareness. And if our strategies for
dealing with these issues are just more forms of intellectual introspection and more “brain hacks,” the
progress is an illusion. That’s why you can meet people who can verbalize all their issues very well, and
may even have been in therapy for years, yet they never improve.

When you get deep emotional awareness, your job isn’t to immediately find self-improvement activities so
that you can distract yourself from the pain as quickly as possible. Your job isn’t to use defense mechanisms
to protect your ego. Your job is to increase the pain, to push deeper into the pain and follow it to its source
and process all those emotions.”


edit: I was starting to type... "I think you like being in your current situation", and I realized I was projecting by typing that. I'm going through my own things, as I'm sure most others are on this forum. It can be very frustrating when you're putting in the time and things aren't going the way you'd like.

"It's not how many hours you put in, it's what you put into the hours."

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PostPosted: Sun Dec 18, 2016 12:18 pm 
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Flow83 wrote:

"Fuck it" is a LOT closer to the experience of emotional releasing.

To analyze something under a microscope you have to hold onto it.


I've tried just about everything to let go and every time I think I'm fine and moving on with my life something comes up.

Right now it's the collective anger from believing all the lies I was fed, each one convinced me that they were good and not like the others. I know better now, that they will all lie to get what they want.

I want relief, I want these emotions gone, for all the introspection I've done over the years, really digging deep, none of it has made a powerful enough impact where I feel relief and finally come out the other end. It's just anger now, I thought I was past it.

I'm going in circles with this shit, it has to end at some point.

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"Simply put, you being in her life is a BLESSING. Her wronging you in any way is her own self-inflicted CURSE, and if she does wrong you, then let the punishment fit the crime. Her life will absolutely SUCK without you."


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PostPosted: Sun Dec 18, 2016 3:17 pm 
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I'm not saying it to be cute or sarcastic - see what it's like to actually say fuck it and not TRY to let go of things and you may tap more into what the posture really is.

Many times you need to run out of moves to really go there. "Letting go" can easily become just another thing we are trying to do in order to move towards everything we are attached to and believe.

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2016 1:20 am 
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Flow83 wrote:
I'm not saying it to be cute or sarcastic - see what it's like to actually say fuck it and not TRY to let go of things and you may tap more into what the posture really is.

Many times you need to run out of moves to really go there. "Letting go" can easily become just another thing we are trying to do in order to move towards everything we are attached to and believe.


I can see the latter and how I've not grasped what it really is.

I've gone in and out of letting go only to have shit come up, that's the shit part, it keeps coming up, when does it end..

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"Simply put, you being in her life is a BLESSING. Her wronging you in any way is her own self-inflicted CURSE, and if she does wrong you, then let the punishment fit the crime. Her life will absolutely SUCK without you."


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 19, 2016 9:18 pm 
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Letting go for the sake of inner peace, today I decided to say fuck it.

Feels better already, I don't need the anger towards her, or the rest in the past, the whole thing, it's ok to live without it, to not care.

What was I holding onto and why? Nothing worth keeping in my head, I feel more liberated saying fuck it to all that.

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"Simply put, you being in her life is a BLESSING. Her wronging you in any way is her own self-inflicted CURSE, and if she does wrong you, then let the punishment fit the crime. Her life will absolutely SUCK without you."


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 10:39 am 
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Alchemist wrote:
Flow83 wrote:
I've gone in and out of letting go only to have shit come up, that's the shit part, it keeps coming up, when does it end..


When you stop asking when it'll end, or minding that is isn't, is when you start to let go.

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 20, 2016 11:50 am 
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Aragorn wrote:
When you stop asking when it'll end, or minding that is isn't, is when you start to let go.


True dat, it's happening now.

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"Simply put, you being in her life is a BLESSING. Her wronging you in any way is her own self-inflicted CURSE, and if she does wrong you, then let the punishment fit the crime. Her life will absolutely SUCK without you."


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 21, 2016 1:42 am 
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Maybe you haven't reached your breaking point yet?

That's what is was like for me, something inside me internally snapped.

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PostPosted: Wed Dec 21, 2016 2:03 am 
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Quote:
She was a mirror and I saw my younger self in her, maybe that's why I felt the need to help, at the same time I should have recognised where she was in her life and that my advice and support would ultimately fall on deaf ears.


I think this part sticks out the most. Perhaps focusing on the metaphor of a mirror, would help you direct your awareness. You don't lack the knowledge you just need to bridge the gap between your emotion and your logic.

I love mirrors, sometimes I play with them in my lucid dreams. There's no analyzing only looking deeply into yourself. It's not that you need to have some psychological knowledge to achieve what you want. Powerful enough awareness should be enough.

I don't know about your past. I was suspected of having PTSD also though, due to a traumatic childhood. Logic alone was never enough for me.

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A truly powerful Man jealously guards his most precious resources; his independence and his ability to maneuver. True power isn’t controlling others, but the degree to which you control the course of your own life and your own choices. -Rational Male


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 21, 2016 1:49 pm 
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I have PTSD from a traumatic event a few years ago, might have already had it from childhood though.

I have the intellectual awareness and I am now just starting to bridge the gap and gain emotional awareness.

The more I realize I'm a catch and I deserve better, the more I can let go.

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"Simply put, you being in her life is a BLESSING. Her wronging you in any way is her own self-inflicted CURSE, and if she does wrong you, then let the punishment fit the crime. Her life will absolutely SUCK without you."


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 14, 2017 4:21 am 
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funny how Kidd said " she wasn't pregnant with his child."

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 14, 2017 4:23 am 
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:lol: :lol: :lol:

I have been to hell and on my way back.
the devil is off my back.
:| we have a child tho

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 16, 2017 3:52 pm 
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Sai wrote:
:lol: :lol: :lol:

I have been to hell and on my way back.
the devil is off my back.
:| we have a child tho


She may be off your back but she will always be lurking, did this just happen?

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"Simply put, you being in her life is a BLESSING. Her wronging you in any way is her own self-inflicted CURSE, and if she does wrong you, then let the punishment fit the crime. Her life will absolutely SUCK without you."


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 16, 2017 4:26 pm 
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Sai wrote:
we have a child tho


I call kids 'knowledge transferring projects' :lol:

Quote:
"We don't own our children; at best we facilitate them in their growth."


I don't have kids, my brother has 3 and has been married 10+ years

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