Natural Freedom

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 Post subject: Ponderings
PostPosted: Wed Oct 08, 2014 1:18 am 
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Joined: Fri Aug 22, 2014 4:38 pm
Posts: 5
Over the last few years of life I have slowly detached myself from others and myself by becoming a loner by choice. What I mean is that I have ceased to let petty emotions bother me, and I no longer hold on to them. It hasn't been a difficult task because of my makeup and personality; garnering emotions is illogical to me. My introspection has made me damn near robotic, yet I'm not quite sure how to act out certain emotions such as anger, sadness, sorrow, loneliness, and guilt because I've never experienced them before, or if I have, I never let them become consuming. I feel super 24/7 because I have learned to accept myself for who I am.

Is it a bad thing to be completely devoid of emotion, or is it best to act out certain emotions when necessary? Do you have to let everyone into your world?


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 Post subject: Re: Ponderings
PostPosted: Wed Oct 08, 2014 7:00 am 
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Hi there blacknbleu!,

I see in your reading, more disconnecting, rather than connecting from "reality."

Let me explain this; you as a person have certain emotional background and interpret emotions pretty much as "life has treated you," not as they are, so thing is, this differs from everyone (but not so much), and experiencing emotions as raw as possible --this is without the aid of the mind, and their labeling task-- it's the best option to have. So this is why I feel doubtful when you don't explain some important things from your "background" (most important thing) thus making me more suspicious, or more hard to analyze to me.
Remember the shadows of the past allways come back to bite your ass, so better get well with them, like NOW.

To me "liberation" doesn't make me more robotic or devoid of emotion, instead has made me more open and in some cases weakened with copious amount of anger, and made laughably stupid in certain aspects of my ego, but with the uo side of becoming more welcoming of emotions or whatever there is, and as it is, and diminish resistance of it to the maximum. I still experience great resistance in some aspects tho.

There's no need to garner emotions, you just have to feel them, and then let them go.

Also it's somewhat contradictory in your text because if you do not know how yo act when X emotion arises in you, it means that you haven't "accepted" them fully, but making a repression of them more powerful... or like just selecting some emotions to cope with, and ignoring other just to appear more powerful.

The acceptance part you mention it's really cool, but I feel a sting in my mind, that this is not true. But I could be way wrong, tho. I hope what you found is not fool's gold, but the real blingy, strange and valuable thing.

I don't understand the letting someone into our world bit, you mention...

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 Post subject: Re: Ponderings
PostPosted: Wed Oct 08, 2014 8:08 am 
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Joined: Sat Feb 18, 2012 3:11 am
Posts: 823
blacknbleu wrote:
I feel super 24/7 because I have learned to accept myself for who I am.
Yet somehow it feels incomplete
Quote:
Is it a bad thing...
What anyone writes is irrelevant. What matters is where YOU feel something is missing. You would not be compelled to think about this at all, let alone post and ask about it, if there were clarity and resolution. Is it objectively right or wrong to remove yourself from the game and the things that trigger you? Irrelevant. Some part of you wants more. Another part is more than happy to hang out there forever, it's certainly nice enough. That's the conflict that is reflected in wanting someone else to give an answer about the right or wrong way.

Your attention, and your questions, go to that part of you that is not fully satisfied. The answers are there directly.
Quote:
I've never experienced them before, or if I have, I never let them become consuming
CAN you? Will you actually become consumed? What might happen, what might you do? If detachment is your only option, you are missing half of the universe. You are also not free to choose either option. A very attractive prison is still prison. Something wants out.

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 Post subject: Re: Ponderings
PostPosted: Wed Oct 08, 2014 10:09 am 
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Joined: Sat Feb 18, 2012 3:35 pm
Posts: 773
Quote:
Do you have to let everyone into your world?
What happens when you "let somebody into your world"? What door are you opening for them?

You seem to be blocking emotions because you are afraid of the vulnerability it would cause for you. A lack of control and freedom seems to be a less attractive option for you than bland control. Why is that?

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 Post subject: Re: Ponderings
PostPosted: Wed Oct 08, 2014 7:45 pm 
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Joined: Fri Jun 18, 2010 11:55 pm
Posts: 3428
Location: Canada
What do you think?

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"The heart is deep beyond all things, and it is the man. Even so, who can know him."


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