In other words, my intelligence, or rather the side effects of intelligence, is actually a hindrance when it comes to relationships?
More like if, you only "think" but don't properly analyse where this thinking (presuposition) is coming from. And we've talked about where the ideas are coming from.
I believe that I'm already in touch with my demons. This is mostly due to the fact that they aren't that large. Unlike many members of this forum, my life was never that messed up. I lived in a family with an alpha male father, we've never had any problems, and even though the amount of friends, close or not, varied throughout my life, i never considered myself lonely. Once i was depressed, but that merely due to having way too much free time (once i joined a sports club, it went away). The only issue that plagues me is insecurity (and only relationship-wise), which is due to no experience. I also know that the only way to cure this insecurity is by getting experience. Quite a vicious cycle.
You are here for a reason, just discover it for yourself. This I cannot tell you. It's ok, some illusory monsters are bigger for some people, and for some other are to a lesser extent, seemingly inofensive. Do not take this shit for granted, as I say earlier dig deep.
For the later about experience and insecurity; If you are balanced internally this will preceed the experience. Calling it otherway; the experience you'll have externally will be a mirror of your internal state. You have this backwards, I know that there is lots of things that you could and can learn externally like the interactions and subtleties about behavior and other cool things about interpersonal relationships. But just reframe this; you feel insecure because you don't have experience but it's the other way around, when you do the challenging work of questioning all your assumptions about relationships and then confront this issues, you'll see that is not an external thing but more like a change of an internal paradigm.
... Actually I'm working in this right now.
This is a bit confusing. So what you're saying is, when i accept myself, I'll be able to separate my emotions and logic, instead of just suppressing my emotions? Also by doing this, i will develop the instincts to read other people? In terms of reading people, i believe that i'm rather good at that, in that i'm usually correct on what they think consciously or subconsciously. However, it has not yet become instinctive for me. I only realize a few minutes after the interaction or when i have some free time; i can't read in real-time. I guess i still have to practice my observation skills.
Some members call it here: "switch between logic and emotion". When you shift to logical mode it'll not be so much ego to get in your way. Ego in the form of a discursive mental parroting, like removing your own golum of LOTR inside your head; it will be more silence and acceptance, flow and enjoyment. And plenty of time time to analyse the situation without feeling: shit, over attached, rushed, emotionally unbalanced, & victimhood biased. You will see the things as they are without your protective radioactive suit (maybe some bitter pills you have to swallow) and you would be able to work from this place, it's like having your desk cleanly organized and easily accesible, so work gets done quicker and more efficently (although some people work in a mess and do wonders
) just to ilustrate the point.
Also, you'll have to put your part. Do not expect some magicall powers bathing over you like a sayian if you accept and know yourself, it'll just make the work FAR easier. Here, we never stop practicing our observation skills, some swords are sharper, some are little bit dull but in the end we all keep practicing. I endorse you to do the same.
TheKidd!! Had an old signature in his posts, that was something like this:
"Logic is the training wheel for the intuition"
Hope it helps.