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intimacy
http://naturalfreedom.info/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=2381		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  Sniper [ Fri Jul 20, 2012 11:53 pm ]
Post subject:  intimacy
Edit: this question was originally to Kidd, Grinus and Star
..................

Hi guys,

I want to talk about this and later after you respond I'll treasure chest it because I think it's an important topic (it has been talked about around but there was never a specific post about it)

I'm now dating a very nice girl however, what I used to think about 'intimacy' was all wrong (so I feel)- the idea about intimacy is mostly drilled into us through the social matrix and esp. Hollywood movies.

so to further clarify my question I'll start with a little 'introduction'-

there was The Kidd's Definition of Love:
Quote:
Love: An emotional response to a logical subconscious assessment of a target that shows most if not all of the qualities that are desirable in a mate from the observer's perspective.
http://www.naturalfreedom.info/viewtopic.php?f=17&t=262

then we talked about the value theory and how people only 'love' the value that you have, so stuff like bonds, connection and people love you for you don't exist:

http://www.naturalfreedom.info/viewtopic.php?f=17&t=710

*and remember value is not just money or status*-

http://www.naturalfreedom.info/viewtopi ... =17&t=1396

and we also talked about how one should become his own best friend without the need for external validation (notice I said need not 'want')

Now on to my question...

I was exchanging pm's with Star and he told me something along the lines of (not these exact words):
women can cook for you, have sex with you but anyone looking for something like 'intimacy' is not his own best friend (Star was referring to intimacy as portrayed by the social matrix- family, movies, TV shows and even songs...)

So now that I'm with this girl and although she treats me well and everything I noticed something about how I used to view 'intimacy' in the past and how I view it now.

basically if you take out the whole social matrix ideas about 'intimacy' - intimacy could be looked at as something along the lines of:

A good emotional\physical response caused by the other person after she gives you some sort of validation (validation for the ego), often followed by some physical action afterwards...

for example:

A woman tells you how great you are, how good you make her feel, how lucky she is to have you, how she loves you....and often it's followed by some physical action afterwards (touch,hug, kiss, sex...)

This is how I see it but I'm not sure I got it right, I could be wrong. Maybe there is something else here that's less 'cold' than what I described.

so I'd love to hear how you guys view 'intimacy'...

(and I'd love it even more- if you say that my definition is too cold and that I didn't get it)
Author:  Slim Titan [ Sat Jul 21, 2012 12:01 am ]
Post subject:  Re: intimacy- question to Kidd, Grinus and Star
sounds like a girl trying to butter a guy up to get him to make some changes.
Author:  Star_Above [ Sat Jul 21, 2012 12:12 am ]
Post subject:  Re: intimacy- question to Kidd, Grinus and Star
Don't even worry about the term intimacy, it's a made up word that means nothing...it tries to describe something that doesn't exist.

A relationship is a parasitic exchange of value, can you take pleasure in your girl saying "Oh baby you're so great, I love you, yadayada"? Of course you can, but see it for what it is and take it at face value...she's not saying it to make you feel good, she's saying it because she thinks she'll get something out of it by behaving that way, ie making you like her more...

You can enjoy it, but don't reciprocate on that level, if you start going "Oh baby you're the one, you are my entire life" in the name of "intimacy", you're gonna have to get real intimate with your right hand shortly thereafter cause that bitch is hitt'n the road.

Just forget all that connection shit, keep being the man you need to be and enjoy the fruits it brings.
Author:  The Kidd!! [ Sat Jul 21, 2012 1:33 am ]
Post subject:  Re: intimacy- question to Kidd, Grinus and Star
Well...looks like the ShitCentipede has everything covered here... :geek:
Author:  Sniper [ Sat Jul 21, 2012 3:46 am ]
Post subject:  Re: intimacy- question to Kidd, Grinus and Star
Alright thanks Star,

we should learn from babies, they seem to know the game:


[ img ]
Author:  peregrinus [ Sun Jul 22, 2012 12:31 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: intimacy- question to Kidd, Grinus and Star
Sniper wrote:
we should learn from babies, they seem to know the game
So do you, somewhere inside you.. You just piled on all this shit during your life that gets in the way of what you know deep down at your core.

After all, you were a baby, so going off your statement - you know... What happened in between then and now?

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