"Every interaction is an opportunity" -someone
For the last few weeks, I've paid very close attention to my interactions with people and I've changed the way I interact with people on a daily basis. I'm slowing down and carefully watching the actions of others. It's proven to be very interesting.
It's given me a boost in confidence as it has made me feel as though I'm in a superior position, almost as if I'm seeing more than the average person might. This confidence has shown itself in my interactions with other people. I've been engaging folks in mini-mind battles, and this new mental state of confidence has allowed me to win most of them. I've gotten people to submit to me. People walking down the street who lock eyes with me will usually avert their eyes before I avert mine. People step aside for me more often than I have to step aside for them. Small things like that. That's what I mean by mini-mind battles.
Here's an example of a slightly larger mind battle:
When I go to class, I like to sit at the back. I like to sit in the back somewhere. In this position, one can observe others while minimizing the number of people who can observe one in return. When I sit in the back, I also like to take up as much space as possible to mark my territory. I don't like people sitting next to me. I like my space, and though I won't actually go out of my way to force someone away from me, but I will do my best to stop them from entering my claim and from putting their things there.
While I wast staking my claim the other night, some chick puts her water bottle on the desk on top of which I was going to place my bag. At first I thought: "Well, she beat me to it. Fair enough". Then I thought "AW, HELL NAW" and I put my bag right on that mother loving desk. Guess what? She moved her water bottle. Damn right. My desk....
Unfortunately, I'm not really winning all of these mind battles. Frankly, I need help in this area. I'm off to a good start, but I need tips on how to win these quiet challenges of power. After all, if I can't handle the small ones, then how can I expect to win when it
really counts?
I'm currently in a mental battle that's more or less in a stalemate. I have a slight advantage in terms of points, but the ball is her court as things stand (this is how I see it, at least).
There is a girl in my Korean culture class I know for sure is attracted to me. I'm not even sure if she realizes it, but she is attracted to me. However, I'm not sure how much. Until recently, I was keeping a close eye on her and stacking evidence. Still, I couldn't tell how attracted to me she was, so I decided to try some old-fashioned compliance testing. So, when the attendance sheet came around for signing, I asked her for a pencil. With a straight face and neutral tone she said "No... It's my pencil". There was no way she was joking or playing around. She was dead serious. Instead, the guy behind me offered me his without hesitation.
I
know I didn't misread her. She likes me for sure, and the only reason she would deny me such a small request would be to challenge me.
Challenge accepted.
However, I'm not sure what my next move should be. Honestly, such a fast and decisive denial stunned me and left me without recourse.
How do I win this mental battle?