moose35,
I find the content of your first post a little pessimistic, limiting and maybe simplistic. I speculate that you are not a pessimist in person, but you have employed these beliefs as a defense mechanism against people and situations that influence you and your pimp tight mentality to bring back the old you, something that I am also facing since I still live with my family. Trust me, you do not have to. After you accept that death will come, when time comes, and you never know when and the fact that it is inevitable, the natural progression of life, there is no reason for you to worry about it or be obsessed with it.
The meaning of life is whatever you make it.
This. Live your life for you, do whatever you feel like (as long as you do not violate the rights of another), leave behind everything and everyone holding you back. We should count both the years in our life and the life in our years, especially the latter. Two necessary conditions for your life to have meaning are health and happiness.
As far as health is concerned, these two should be mandatory for everyone to take a look at:
http://www.drmcdougall.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=7875
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=30gEiweaAVQ&feature=plcp
As far as happiness is concerned, this forum is more than enough. True happiness comes from within.