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 Post subject: Altruism and Charity
PostPosted: Sun Nov 30, 2014 10:34 pm 
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Merriam-Webster Dictionary wrote:
altruism: feelings and behavior that show a desire to help other people and a lack of selfishness
Recently read a short essay on this topic which discussed altruism being labeled as innately 'impossible' in humans. The author mentioned that in Uni they learnt the act of altruism is not possible, because the giver is receiving an equal return for the altruistic act.

I thought about this and wanted to write about it and see what everyone else thinks.

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Do you think 'The Matrix' conditions us to believe altruism doesn't or can a person give without receiving in return?
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My thoughts, especially after learning a lot from here, is that there is a return in the transaction for the giver, be it if he/she is aware of it or not. I believe what I stated above is a fact; a transaction occurs for both parties, receiver/giver. However, it is were the act is coming from, intentions, that is equally as important.

Is it just to help another person out?
Is it to feel good about themselves for being a 'good' person?
Are they seeking something else in return?
What is it?

I can give an example relating to my own life and how I was in the past. I was a person who was 'nice' to nearly everyone I met. I believed I was being a 'GOOD PERSON'. I did many acts of kindness and helped many people with different things.

However, this is funny to me now...back then I believed my intentions where SINCERE, no hidden agendas. Not until I found myself here on Natural Freedom and did some introspection did I find out that my "acts of niceness" were not as sincere as I had thought them to be. I had attached hidden strings to my acts of kindness that I wasn't even aware of. It's funny, because I remember believing then that I was a good and sincere person; fully believed it!

What I attached to my acts of kindness: wanting acceptance and/or appreciation from the person(s) I was helping. I did my 'acts of kindness' in hopes that the receivers of my act(s) would fill my 'half-empty cup'. I was not coming from a WHOLE place.

This relates to my thought on the matter by my belief that acts of SINCERE kindness, altruistic behavior, can only be done from a WHOLE place. Meaning the individual is coming from a place of abundance and doesn't NEED anything from the receiver (acceptance, praise, whatever). "I have everything I NEED already...you look like you need some help though."

Altruistic behavior does exist ONLY when a person is coming from a WHOLE place. The transaction does occur, however if the individual giving is coming from a WHOLE place, then the return value of the receiver is not of importance to the giver, because they don't NEED it. Indifference to the outcome of it.

Those are my thoughts and views at the moment. What do the rest of you think on the subject?


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 Post subject: Re: Altruism and Charity
PostPosted: Mon Dec 01, 2014 9:59 am 
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Very interesting post bliss. Once again, thanks for sharing.

I believe that the large majority of the world does things in this fashion. Started seeing it with my parents, but also saw how it applied to other people I knew as well. Most of the time, people were only nice to those who they could gain something from. I tried this formula to get recognition. Just dug myself a deeper hole.

Mainly though, I acted nice because I was afraid of being labeled as "selfish" - a label given to me by my parents whenever they didn't get their way. I felt my value to the world was directly related to how happy other people were around me, even if it meant getting completely neglected. As you said, I NEEDED something from others, and this was the way I went about it.

However, now, I am consciously helping others out and doing my best to observe the urge to be recognized for this. Very helpful in recognizing the things I still need to work on.

There's a nice quote I found that relates to this - "Real generosity is doing something nice for someone who will never find out."

I honestly believe we should be kind to one another (when possible), but expecting something in return (which can be obvious or very subtle) makes it a transaction at best, and more often than not simple manipulation.

EDIT:
Quote:
This relates to my thought on the matter by my belief that acts of SINCERE kindness, altruistic behavior, can only be done from a WHOLE place. Meaning the individual is coming from a place of abundance and doesn't NEED anything from the receiver (acceptance, praise, whatever). "I have everything I NEED already...you look like you need some help though."

Altruistic behavior does exist ONLY when a person is coming from a WHOLE place. The transaction does occur, however if the individual giving is coming from a WHOLE place, then the return value of the receiver is not of importance to the giver, because they don't NEED it. Indifference to the outcome of it.
LOVED these 2 quotes. And they don't apply to altruism exclusively 8-)

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 Post subject: Re: Altruism and Charity
PostPosted: Wed Dec 03, 2014 4:18 pm 
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Quote:
"Giving and receiving are two sides of the same coin.
Whoever decided that it is better to give than to receive,
was simply bad at math."

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 Post subject: Re: Altruism and Charity
PostPosted: Thu Dec 04, 2014 3:26 am 
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Both are ego moves, in some cases these are more perverse actions, than the pure act of pure egoism.

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 Post subject: Re: Altruism and Charity
PostPosted: Thu Dec 04, 2014 9:16 am 
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I just don't worry about it too much. If I am subconsciously doing something to make my ego feel better and it has a positive effect. It doesn't really matter.

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 Post subject: Re: Altruism and Charity
PostPosted: Thu Dec 04, 2014 1:18 pm 
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Dali wrote:
Both are ego moves, in some cases these are more perverse actions, than the pure act of pure egoism.
Could you elaborate a bit on this?

I disagree with what you said, BUT I'm also finding myself agreeing on a gut level. :lol:


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