For those who have been curious about the on goings between my keeper and I since my first post speaking about our 'break' (if you need to be brought up to speed: viewtopic.php?p=18324#p18324 ), this is for you.
I discovered (via my gut then thru interrogation) that my keeper had become sweet on someone else in her class about a week after the break was initiated. At that point I initiated dating protocol...I told her that it was pretty fucked up that she tried to put it on me like I was somehow the person in the wrong, but that I understand that's how people do things sometimes when faced with awkward situations. I told her that from that point we would consider ourselves to be dating and, as a courtesy, to let the other party know if either of us decide to become sexually involved with someone else.
Then, I made myself scarce...not TOO scarce mind you...but I became much less proactive than I already wasn't, if you get what I mean.
During this time I flirted a bit, but I'm just really at a point where I'm just over having sex for the sake of having sex...I have a fondness for connected sex (see here: viewtopic.php?f=17&t=329 ). Now, SHE wasn't aware of all that, so whatever her imagination concocted that I might be doing with my free time, she didn't ask and I didn't volunteer.NOW...in most cases like this, I would jettison the flotsam and get on with it...HOWEVER...my keeper is a bonafide x-factor. That being said, no one is perfect, and so neither is she. I EXPECTED something like this to happen and had already planned FOR it to happen, being that she is young, hot and impressionable. BECAUSE I was already anticipating something of this nature to happen sooner or later, I have been preparing from the beginning and planted countermeasures in place the whole time. In a way...I kinda feel like this NEEDED to happen...kinda of like you HAVE to touch the stove to know that it is indeed HOT.
Here is where the title of this post comes into play. FOUNDATION
![[ img ]](http://blog.whatsyourprice.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/Cougar-Cub-Curve.png)
This chart should look familiar. She is 23...I am 38. Our peaks are almost in sync...difference is her's still can go up till about 25-26, whereas mine is already starting it's slow, gentle decline. So although in the longer term our graphs level out almost equally, she still has yet to peak. This means that it is no surprise that this has happened...my girl gets hit on all day, every day! Good news is, she HATES getting hit on randomly in the street/club/etc...BAD NEWS is, she is susceptible to familiar surroundings/people. I met her at a family BBQ...her defenses were down. This yahoo that was getting at her is a classmate...her defenses were down. I'm not making any excuses for her...she did what she did and now she has her work cut out for her (more on that later), but I can see how this could happen.
Anyhoo...did I throw a fit? NO. Was I jealous? Not going to lie...somewhat...BUT!!...did I let HER know that? NO...I kept my poker face on at all times. Did I go out of my way to do anything different to attempt to convince her to 'pick me'? NO! Some of you may thinking, "Well why not?"...it would be a knee jerk response for most men to step up their efforts in this type of situation. The reason why I didn't, is because I knew that my FOUNDATION would do most if not all of the work for me...and you know what? It DID.
The FOUNDATION that I laid down with her from day one...finishing how I started...combined with the PATIENCE to not over compensate or act on my jealousy and the discipline to give her the SPACE to work through this HERSELF is what ultimately led to what happened yesterday afternoon.
She came over after school saying she felt very emotional and wasn't sure why. I prodded and got it out of her: She realized that she was a selfish bitch for putting her wants above her needs and jeopardizing our relationship. Turns out, once this dude caught wind that she was somewhat available (I was still fucking her occasionally), HE became super insecure, jealous and possessive, even though they were NEVER an item.
All I had to do was give her the SPACE to let HIM fuck up.
She told me the last straw was when he told her that he had snuck and gone through her phone and then confronted her about why she was still talking to ME. She has had ENOUGH of men like that...which is part of the reason why my relationship with her is the longest relationship she has ever been in. She also volunteered that as he became more silly, she made a pros/cons list for both me AND him...of course my list blew his out of the water (BEST OPTION). I won out not only because of FOUNDATION, PATIENCE and SPACE, but also because I've always focused on her NEEDS and not her WANTS. This guy was ultimately more focused on HIS wants more than anything...and that is weak sauce compared to anything I was doing or had ever done.
So now...she has to make it up to me.
...she knows my birthday is coming up, for starters. I asked her how does she want us to be...she said that she wants us to be married 
...I told her I mean as far as RIGHT NOW. ...she stated that she knows she needs to work hard to get us back to how we used to be, but that I'm worth it...she knows how badly she screwed up (mind you those two hadn't even KISSED...I guess you could call it an emotional affair? 
) and will do everything in her power to make it right...I told her I hope you are up for this. So as it stands now, we are still 'dating'. Eventually I will tell her that if we are to get married, she will be the one proposing...this way I know that she is serious. Whatever that was agreed to regarding marriage/engagement prior to this event is now null and void...SHE fucked that off. By her doing what she did, it puts all the onus on her and she knows she's behind the 8-Ball...I basically got to turn in all the evidence she gave me for bullets and shoot her in the face with my once-dusty-yet-still-oh-so-trusty Front Blaster...and get to totally re-write the contract to boot!
The moral here is this: NEVER DOUBT YOURSELF...NOR QUESTION YOUR SELF WORTH. I didn't have to do anything but wait for her to figure it out while my 'competition' basically pushed her right back to me via his actions and vibe. Like I said...I knew she wasn't going ANYWHERE...it just makes life that much better for me once SHE figures that out, whatever the means may be.
Going forward, she will be forever much more aware of her susceptibility in situations such as this...and will deploy her own countermeasures to insure she doesn't fuck up the best thing that has ever happened to her in her life again...'cause one chance is all you get...with The Kidd!!
Pratting at its best. 