Ok this isn't like the Kidd's stories but I made progress and I feel like sharing, so here goes:
this week my ex-girlfriend talked to me (we are still in touch). She still has feelings for me.....
anyway, we talked on Monday and here is how it went:
Her: I want to see you Friday just you and Me.
Me: sounds good but I can't promise you anything yet since I have three big assignments (from the uni.) I need to finish until Friday night And send them via email to my professor (Friday night is the deadline). this is my last semester - very hard and intense
Her: I won't take no for an answer
Me: honey you know you can't control me or tell me what to do, so why do you even try?
Her: hehe, ok but please try.....
Thursday I saw that I was not going to finish everything by Friday night but I wanted to take a break on Thursday night. So I called her to tell her that I can't Friday and asked her if she is doing anything today (Thursday). She said she is going to visit a mutual friend of ours.
I called that friend and told him I'll come over to his place for a beer.
So I went to his place and there was Him, Me and her. She made me and my friend a great salad at his place.
We had a beer and a great time and when it got late I said I'm tired and I'm going home. I asked her if she wants a lift home. She said yes and I took her home.
when we got to her place it was late I was so tired but I stoped the car and walked with her a little bit in the park (near her house).
we kissed and made out, if she was not living with her parents maybe I would have gone up to her place and spend the night with her. But she lives with her parents so I could not.
I could have taken her to my place but then I'd have to drive her home afterwards (because she does not live in the same city as me and her family is old fashion) so she could not sleep in my place- her family knows we are not dating anymore...
So I made out with her and we kissed until I was too tired and went home.
She called me today and told me she can't stop thinking about me......
I can sleep with her if I want to and maybe I will.... but that's not the point.
what is the point of the title? and why I said I got my edge?
because unlike in the past where I was thinking too much, this time I just did what I felt like doing. I felt like kissing her and making out with her and I did. I was not in my head thinking of what she is going to think, or if she gets the wrong idea, etc....
I'm not bad I just got out of my head and stopped trying to think for 'her' (as David X and The Kidd say...). I didn't promise her anything or manipulate her- I just did what I felt like doing and if she does not like it, she can always say no.
for me that is a part of having the edge. Going with what you feel and not being stuck in your head trying to think for her......