Natural Freedom

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PostPosted: Thu Mar 09, 2017 10:50 pm 
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It's amazing to me the transition that has taken place in my mind, emotions, and outer world over the last year. I fully went into letting go of chasing women about a full year ago. I followed Brent Smith's method for the first 6 months or so and was still doing a lot of subtle chasing by starting up conversations and filling space a lot but coming from 3 years of PUA and directly hitting on women I was literally chasing down in the street, it was a huge step in the right direction. I then came upon Rom Wills and started listening to all of his stuff and it just resonated with me so much more. I spent all year focused on my work and dancing so I wasn't really even attempting to meet women anyway let alone make time for them so it all worked out well. I was shifting my mindset, interacting with women in normal life but not out at bars trying to talk to them or anything. Around 2.5-3 months ago I found this site and between the game I had learned from Rom and the discipline I was already practicing, I was able to really cultivate and refine my discipline and stop chasing women all together. I dropped my social mask and stopped suppressing my sexual desires in public while letting go of any need to do anything about it other than enjoy the feeling within my body. I still notice subtle ways in which I will still chase from time to time, fragments of the virus program that was embedded so deeply into my psyche and my being but I don't sweat it or worry about it anymore. It's just more work to do on myself and it gets easier and easier to let go of the last little bits of the faulty programming everyday.

Here's a pretty funny example of what I'm talking about...


There's a girl who's a hostess at this restaurant I get takeout around once/week from. She's physically a 9 on pretty much every level. Banging body, very pretty face, and just oozes sex appeal to the point I feel very turned on and tingles running through my body when I'm around her(sexual vibe/tension). A couple years ago I would have lost my mind around this kind of girl trying to figure out how to get her, flirting with her all the time, etc... Now I just recognize it as a biological response to a woman that genetically is the epitome of what causes a massive stimulus response in the human nervous system. It's automatic, I no longer attempt to suppress it, rather I just sit in it and enjoy the way I feel without making it about her. Because the kicker is she had been pretty cold to me and played very aloof and indifferent to start off. So I just ignored her mostly. I would say Hi and be cordial when ordering my food but I treated her according to the energy she was giving off. It's been a fun transition to watch as it's like a game of human chess, going back and forth from cold to hotter to cold to a little warmer, etc..

At first I legitimately thought she may very well have zero interest in me, perhaps I wasn't her type or whatever....no big deal. She gave me almost overly cold energy though so I just returned the favor and paid her no attention. As I saw her more though it started to become clear she was interested in me and is just playing games. She plays the game of knowing we both feel a strong sexual attraction for one another but she plays indifferent in an attempt to not validate/acknowledge what we're both feeling first, in an attempt to get me to acknowledge it first by flirting with her and hitting on her. I refuse to play her game. I just sit there and never engage with her beyond Hello, order food, cya later. Maybe the 4th time I came in she asked my name, I tell her and she says....oh yea, you come here all the time and then I just give her my order and proceed as usual. The very next time I come in and she says....Hey, is it "my name" or Nick? I say, it's "my name"(so you kinda remember my name but narrowed it down to only 2 possibilities that are not even close to one another....ok, I see your game and just keep ignoring), I order, then immediately go outside and dance while I'm waiting for my food. I'm off to the side out of sight from the desk she's behind but as I'm dancing I see her out from behind the desk watching me with a smile on her face. She eventually brings my food outside to me and has a big smile on her face but doesn't say anything. Next time, I just sit inside and listen to my music. The sexual vibe between us is at an all time high but I just enjoy my music and don't pay her any attention beyond the fact she's standing right in front of me and I see her squirming. Last night I go in, she's slightly more open and friendly, I order and go sit with no music. Sexual tension is in the air once again and after a few minutes she comes over to me and says....no music today? I tell her I was just at the Chili Peppers concert and I'm all music'd out. She gets kinda excited and was like, how we're they. I say they we're really good and she says, I wanted to go to that and then just scurries off to the back and comes out with my food in record time.

I've seen this girl go from very cold and blatantly ignoring me to slowly opening up and letting go of the game she's so used to playing with guys. She tried to play the indifferent, pretend she doesn't feel the sexual tension game with me and is slowly realizing she's never going to win it. I don't blame her though, out of 100 guys she plays that game with 99.5 of them are going to let her win. I simply don't care if I ever hook up with her or not, there's too many girls out there that are willing to get in line with my program and chase me. The first 9 months or so of my 1 year into letting go of chasing women was mostly me just suffering through wanting to chase them, wanting validation from them, and letting go of all of it as literally zero women showed any real level of interest in me(that I noticed at least while I was in my neurotic state busy filling space). The last 3 months though, I have seen them all start slowly falling in line with my program which is....the woman must chase me. The last 5-6 weeks of which everything has exponentially amped up to a point where I just see women looking at me totally flustered, like they want to burst out of their skin to chase after me. And the funny thing is this girl is no different, she's slowly starting to fall in line with it too. It's like a very long game of chess where these girls just get closer and closer(more a cold/hot back and forth slowly getting hotter in the long run) each day to giving up the game and outing their intentions to me, to dropping their social mask and just being the feminine, vulnerable, little girl they are inside that wants to come out and be with a real man. So many girls I either interact with or am just around look at me like I'm some sort of unicorn they've never seen before. They probably haven't interacted with many if any guys like me before, there's very few real men in the world that can calmly say no to them and the emotional games they play. Stopping bullets and roof jumping is something most guys will never be able to do or believe is possible. If they only knew....


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2017 3:20 am 
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Joined: Mon Jan 31, 2011 2:18 am
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:)

Hey good to hear from you luciddream, I see that you are very active lately and Im very interested in your readings because, I admit it: even If I had 7 or more years in these forums I haven't advanced much due to my relapses, and mostly EGO, I just saw illusions of advancements here and there, or met a girl and became attached and ruined my advances, --not with her-- but, the "pimpthihghtness" that I thought I had down my belt to a point, as you throughly describe you have.

Thank you for taking the time to write all this invaluable stuff. Congrats!

PD,.
I identify with your readings because I see you arrived at the place I want to be, and I'm focusing on it more and more, still dropping some layers of falsehood here and there, coming back to inner work and all that, and actually re-reading all the forum again, and transcribing it manually, I actually bought a electrical typewriter machine and I translate this posts to spanish (this forces me to analize it better and slowly, because the inner voice in my mind speaks "taco", and listening Kidd!! and Mr. grinus in spanish and the other super cool guys, is entertaining)

Regards.

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“Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power. If you realize that you have enough, you are truly rich.”


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2017 6:56 am 
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I'm glad my posts are inspiring you. This place has a been a huge inspiration for me and while I was already on this path well before I got here, it helped me shift to the place I'm in much faster and really cement my mindsets.

Something to think about which you already know intuitively because you've already experienced, it's just been so long ago you probably forgot.

Remember when you were a kid, like 6-11 years old before you hit puberty and you would just play and have fun and do your thing and girls would chase you around and attempt to insert themselves into your life and what you were doing? Well guess what, nothing has changed at all at the deepest level. However, society and general social agreements you make because of what you see happening around you have flipped the roles and now the men are running around chasing the women. Why? Just go back to your natural state when you were a kid and had fun and enjoyed your life. If you have a career you really enjoy then you really have no excuse because you can just pour yourself into that. If you have a job you don't like then women should be the last thing on your mind anyway, your entire focus should be on creating some sort of side hustle you get going that you love to do and generates extra income for you as you transition to being an entrepreneur. Yea, I get it that not every guy is built to be his own boss but if you've found this site and the stuff here resonates with who you are then that doesn't apply to you so STOP making excuses and START making choices that line up with your vision of what you want in life. Not sure how much of that applies to you Dali, the whole career/job thing but that's general advice for everyone. If you want a great life be doing something that fits in line with who you are. Even if you are working for someone, it needs to be doing something you genuinely love doing. How can you expect to be attracting people into your life if you spend most of you day not enjoying what you're spending your time on?

All of this shit starts out being about women but by the end you realize it has nothing to do with women. It is about mastery of yourself, your thoughts/emotions/actions and developing the ability to be a man that has choice in every area of his life. That is naturally attractive to women so they just become a side effect of who you are. This was your natural state when you were a kid. Beyond what your parents told you that you could/couldn't do....you did whatever you wanted and didn't give a fuck about what anyone else thought about it, especially not some girl.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2017 9:50 am 
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Joined: Mon Jan 31, 2011 2:18 am
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Word! My man.

Gonna keep reading stuff of yours.

Keep the good game.

_________________
“Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power. If you realize that you have enough, you are truly rich.”


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 10, 2017 9:02 pm 
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*slow clap* beautiful post :)

I want to ask you something: what are in this case the signs of "aloof/cold/bitchiness/queenofbitchland" she gave you at the beginning? I mean physically/body language/face expression... (a part that the true evidence was her asking you personal question like your name :mrgreen: ).

You know why I ask this? cause there is a girl who is a waitress at a cafe' that months ago i used to go there taking a coffee with the mentor at that time, black hair and black eyes. Cute, but for sure she is not making me a boner like your chick...I mean, she has that very childish tone of voice that is absolutely adorable and at the same time you want to tease her/making fun of her all the time for having that voice. :lol:
She goes in the same "places" I go to the beach to take the sun, laying on towel and reading a book/listening music just like I do...I know that because when I am going there, I see when she goes back or that she comes and sometimes we come across and as I look straight (roads are tight here the ones close the beach) she see me first and as we came closer and closer, she force herself not look at me, in my eyes but to look on right or on left...(and last time I think, I am not very sure, she saw me from distance, because I take a lap to see the fishermen there and I saw somebody gazing at me, and I look at that person for 1 sec and look away I see her gazing at me and few seconds later she did like a gesture of, you know when you pretend to feel a itchy leg but is not? it was funny to see that :lol: :lol: )

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If you're a woman that has trouble with men, or a man that has trouble with women, it's not the men or the women that are the problem, it's you. - Jordan Peterson


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PostPosted: Sat Mar 11, 2017 6:00 am 
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My sensi is jujitsu said something that stuck with me the other day.

"We learn 87 throws before black belt. How are you supposed to remember that many? You don't in the end you learn it's one throw"

I've spent year honing my observation skills, and usually the really attractive girls have too good of a poker face for me to read. It's pretty impressive actually, but like lucid said it doesn't matter.

It's also ironic they craft a distant attitude to get attention but smart guys don't pay attention to girls that show no interest. Attention is the currency of girl land especially attention from the right guy, control the supply.

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A truly powerful Man jealously guards his most precious resources; his independence and his ability to maneuver. True power isn’t controlling others, but the degree to which you control the course of your own life and your own choices. -Rational Male


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PostPosted: Sat Mar 11, 2017 4:31 pm 
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PimpDee wrote:
I want to ask you something: what are in this case the signs of "aloof/cold/bitchiness/queenofbitchland" she gave you at the beginning? I mean physically/body language/face expression... (a part that the true evidence was her asking you personal question like your name :mrgreen: ).


So I left just a little bit out. The first time I ever saw this girl was very brief with no personal interaction whatsoever though it did set the stage for the way all of this took place and actually makes sense why she's probably been over the top in being cold/aloof.

Some nights they have 2 hostesses working this restaurant. So I come in to order takeout and a different girl is there. She immediately is all over me and just submits her femininity to me from jump. We chat for 10 minutes or so off and on as other customers are coming in and she's helping them. She's telling me some personal/vulnerable stuff about herself and kinda gushing over me and how calm and carefree I am about the fact I just flew back into town and immediately found out my car wouldn't start. She had been telling me how she had an issue with her car a few days ago and I had just landed, got home, and my car didn't start but wasn't concerned which apparently showed and impressed her even more than she had been already. Fast forward to like 10 minutes in and the cold/aloof girl must have come back from break or something. She walks up as I'm talking to this other girl and just kills the vibe. The other girl kinda went cold around her, as she's the alpha female type/popular girl in high school. I didn't really care so I just let it go and took a seat while I waited for my food. I've actually yet to run into the first really feminine girl again, she told me she had another job so I assume she only hostesses at this restaurant 1 or 2 days per week or something. Standoffish girl probably just assumed I started the conversation and was hitting on the other girl which is the opposite of what actually happened but as she only caught us 10 minutes in she could do nothing more than make assumptions. She was likely waiting for me to start hitting on her like she probably assumed I had done first with the other girl.

Besides this tho, how did I know she was acting cold/aloof/bitchy but was actually still interested? Call it a gut feeling because I didn't know for sure, it was certainly possible that she wasn't interested but given the info I had previously left out on top of the fact that she's the hostess at a restaurant and is paid to be friendly to customers...the fact that she's kinda going out of her way to give me somewhat cold energy is telling. It's like she's trying to get me to make her warm up to me by begging for her attention or flirting with her in an attempt to open her up rather than just showing up already opened up/feminine like the other girl did which is why she got attention from me. She could have just been having a bad day though, the more interactions I've had with her now thought I think she was just acting cold.


Altair wrote:
My sensi is jujitsu said something that stuck with me the other day.

"We learn 87 throws before black belt. How are you supposed to remember that many? You don't in the end you learn it's one throw"

I've spent year honing my observation skills, and usually the really attractive girls have too good of a poker face for me to read. It's pretty impressive actually, but like lucid said it doesn't matter.

It's also ironic they craft a distant attitude to get attention but smart guys don't pay attention to girls that show no interest. Attention is the currency of girl land especially attention from the right guy, control the supply.



Great post!

Exactly, it really doesn't matter. I took note she was cold to me only in the sense that I wasn't going to show her any real attention til she showed me something new about herself.

Girls want attention from guys really badly and most guys give it out like Halloween candy. Any attention you give a girl should be at the level she has earned, you should never be gawking at and/or fawning over some girl that will barely look at you. Now while the vast majority of girls desperately want attention from Men, they're mostly getting it from boys in adult bodies. Girls don't value free attention for no reason, they take it, add it to their already overflowing ego, and spill it all over the place on almost everyone else in the area. When they run into a REAL MAN though, a man that treats them accordingly and gives them the attention they actually deserve which is many cases is little to none....this will be the guy they actually NEED the attention from and their programming will start going haywire trying to figure out how to get it. It doesn't dawn of some of them for awhile that to get the attention they crave all they have to do is drop the facade and be real, be vulnerable and feminine. And some haven't done it in so long they don't know how to truly be that anymore because they've covered it up with so many layers of social programming, they're only used to being the fake version of it and to be truly feminine is actually emotionally painful for them....so they don't do it anymore despite the fact it's subconsciously what they are always being pulled towards(assuming the environment is safe to do so).


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PostPosted: Sat Mar 11, 2017 4:55 pm 
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The other thing I should mention is that as men we are walking a tightrope when it comes to treating people accordingly because we can be genuinely very nice to 1 girl and then a complete dick to the next. There is also everything in between so it takes a lot of work on yourself and dealing with people/situations that test your emotional fortitude to guage the right way to be with various people. The thing to remember is that some girls will be cold from jump, that's true. However if someone has put themselves in my orbit where it makes sense for me to say hello to them, I'll give them a simple...Hi or How ya doin, which is an opportunity for them to open up in my presence. It makes no difference to me whether they take this opportunity or not and they will be treated accordingly going forward based on how they respond to the opportunity. Some girls are going to submit to you instantly at the first chance they get. Others are going to be more cold and aloof and miss their opportunity. Sometimes they are too caught up in their own world and own shit to realize what they're missing. Other times they know what an amazing opportunity it is because they can feel it in their body to the point it scares them and makes them so nervous they can't function properly and their programming causes them to self sabotage. This is actually a good thing because the girls that do this are emotionally fucked up and they aren't ready to be with a REAL MAN. They would only cause you way too much headache and problems and you would almost assuredly have to compromise your values just to fuck them, so for me it's not worth it and I just choose to ignore them. I do however like to give people an opportunity to show me they are a new person. Some girls take awhile to open up because they've never been around a man they can trust enough to do so. These girls will need a fair bit of guidance as you date them and some won't make it very far before they cross your boundaries and you get rid of them. Each man will have to decide what his threshold for dealing with these kind of girls is because many are like this and the idea of dealing with a REAL MAN for most girls is more than they can handle right away and they almost won't even believe they've found one so they will be naturally inclined to test you, the same as you would a diamond before you bought it. Only imagine the store you were in had 1000 diamonds in it and only 10 were real, the rest were cubic zurconia...even after finding out you had a real diamond you might be still be a little skeptical


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