Natural Freedom

Forum for the natural awakening and self-realization of men
It is currently Thu Jun 29, 2017 1:24 pm

All times are UTC [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 49 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3  Next
Author Message
PostPosted: Tue Nov 24, 2015 4:22 pm 
Offline

Joined: Fri Sep 28, 2012 7:22 pm
Posts: 211
Hey guys i was hoping if you guys can help me identify to see if this behavior is a crutch.

As i have posted here i started losing my hair years ago.Over a year ago,I started lifting weights because i didn't like the way i look being naturally ectomorphic,Specifically "thin and bald".When i was younger and had a full head of hair i didn't have a compulsion to put on muscle.In addition,I am naturally narrow shouldered and have a thin neck.Now through a year of weightlifting and adding exercises to target these areas for my genetics such as lateral raises for shoulders since shoulder presses are not enough and dumbell shrugs from my traps since my traps are literally naturally non existent.With the addition of these exercise to compound movements i now have normal traps and my shoulders no longer look narrow.Meaning traps are at least somewhat existent.I went from a thin build with a thin neck to average muscular build which i think is keeping the bald head intact.Although i am satisfied with the way i look now "in relation to my bald head" i feel like the only reason i am going to the gym is to be "anti thin and bald" the same way someone goes to the doctor three times a week to treat an illness.I lift weights three times a week.There was a time a month ago where i stopped doing freeweights for a couple weeks and just did chinups,pullups,pushups and found that my traps were completely gone as well as my side delts flat no longer having that curve.I felt ugly being thin and bald even though my bodyfat percent was relatively low.

Now if i had a full head of hair i wouldn't care about my side delts or my traps being existent or being thin.I would just do pushups,pullups,bodyweight squats and call it a day.Maybe do this 2 or three times a week.This how i would behave and carry on if i had a full head of hair.I enjoy the organic nature of these bodyweight exercise and the fact that they don't require a gym.

From the sounds of this post does it sound like i am using weightlifting as a crutch because i don't like the look of being "thin and bald" with no traps and narrow shoulders though these things wouldn't bother me if i had a full head of hair?


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Nov 24, 2015 6:52 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Fri Jun 18, 2010 11:55 pm
Posts: 2923
Location: Canada
Use it to your advantage then.

If you want a bigger neck then work on wrestler bridges. Be very careful though and warm up well and go slowly.

_________________
A truly powerful Man jealously guards his most precious resources; his independence and his ability to maneuver. True power isn’t controlling others, but the degree to which you control the course of your own life and your own choices. -Rational Male


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Nov 24, 2015 7:34 pm 
Offline

Joined: Fri Sep 28, 2012 7:22 pm
Posts: 211
Yes but i am wondering if i am going about things from a healthy place internally

Several months ago i had extreme insecurities about my body hair and for awhile shaved my arms.After many failed attempts of growing it out i have accepted it and actually embrace it.Went out to a bar few weeks ago and was shirtless.Hairy chest,hairy arms,Hairy back No shame.So now i want to tackle this.

When my hair started receding halfway back to my head, i started shaving it.I like the bald look,however i didn't like the combination of being naturally "thin and bald".Notice only the combination bothers me.thin and "full head of hair" no problem.

I know that one one hand it is socially conditioning to believe that one needs to look like vin diesel or the rock to pull off the bald look.But i don't aspire to be that muscular.Just bald and average-medium frame vs bald and thin.I don't know if this is healthy but this is the way i feel.I am technically still trying to "manipulate" a circumstance(hair loss) by adding another layer(weight lifting meatier neck/traps and shoulders)

However, if i don't do any shrugs/rows/lateral raises that put some meat on my upperbody area to conteract a thin and bald frame i feel ugly.My mind can't stop associating it with the images below as well as people who look similar when i see them in real life.To me they look like little bitches(i know this sounds negative but i want to put it out there so you guys can see what is going on internally)and sometimes when i see them i want to punch them in the face for looking bald and thin.

With my natural bodytype i would have this kind of frame with baldness and unlike these guys who didn't counteract their baldness by lifting weights i feel ugly "with a shaved head and being thin" and as a result of being bald going to the gym to avoid looking like these guys.Is this coming from a bad internal place?Note again thin frame and hair no problem.Making adjustments because of the hairloss(anti-bald and thin neck/narrow shoulder therapy going to the gym) that is what i am questioning.The underlying motivation behind it.Is this healthy

When i see these guys who are bald it makes me see ugliness in myself which is one of the main reasons why i go to the gym

http://www.moby.com/sites/default/files ... launch.jpg

http://40.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m9xjf ... 1_1280.jpg

http://s1.tvequals.com/tv/up/2010/11/Jim-Rash.jpg

I was thinking of stopping lifting weights and forcing myself to lose muscles in my neck i have developed through months of shrugging/rowing .My traps would shrink after a couple weeks.Also stop doing lateral raises so my shoulders become naturally narrower.Then forcing myself to be thin and bald for a few months to see if over time i will become desensitized to the ugly feelings being thin and bald "triggers" seeing those images of the guys above.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Nov 24, 2015 8:11 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Apr 10, 2010 5:51 pm
Posts: 1579
Location: Laniakea Supercluster
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lf6CLSjnUNA

"The body"

_________________
"When values are clear, decisions are easy." ---Dan Peña


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 5:01 am 
Offline

Joined: Sat Feb 18, 2012 3:11 am
Posts: 728
Jared wrote:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lf6CLSjnUNA

"The body"


Nice.

--

Having preferences and making them a reality is healthy.

Obsessive mental analysis of whether your completely harmless, natural preferences are healthy or not, is unhealthy. I don't use the word lightly.

_________________
http://www.innerreconciliation.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 12:05 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sat Feb 18, 2012 3:35 pm
Posts: 739
Does it bother you that you are thin and bald, or does it bother you that other people might not think well of you because you are thin and bald?

_________________
Take it easy, man. But take it.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 4:39 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 06, 2010 2:06 am
Posts: 1165
Location: Foundation/Root
caliboy, do the same amount of work on your mind, as you do on your neck muscles.

also 100 push ups,100 squats , 100 sit ups and a 10 K run every

single

day.

_________________
"I'd rather have no bitch than a half a bitch" Iceberg Slim


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 5:12 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Feb 18, 2012 3:11 am
Posts: 728
Sai wrote:
caliboy, do the same amount of work on your mind, as you do on your neck muscles.


Advice of the year

_________________
http://www.innerreconciliation.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 5:32 pm 
Offline

Joined: Fri Sep 28, 2012 7:22 pm
Posts: 211
Aragorn wrote:
Does it bother you that you are thin and bald, or does it bother you that other people might not think well of you because you are thin and bald?


To answer your question i would probably say #2
It also bothers me that people who are alot thinner than me have bigger traps and they don't even workout.There is a part of that hates my natural ethiopian genetics combines with being bald. I don't know what it is man but i just don't feel like i am sexy around woman unless i have at least a medium frame with some traps and a manly upper body area(V taper) to accentuate the baldness.The bald guys you see women lusting after are the mostly ones who have meat on them. Before i put on some meat i would get comments from people who didn't know me like baldy or a girl said to me is she mean to you because your bald.After lifting for a year and putting on some meat i no longer get those comments anymore,not once.Almost as if it is socially acceptable to be bald because you have some meat on you.Also,although i never get directly approached woman look at more and also some people get intimidated now that i am a little bigger and it sometimes feels good having that one up on them.Perhaps the muscles mask insecurity.I was bullied as a teenager so it feels good to at least look like you are not weak.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 10:05 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Feb 18, 2012 3:11 am
Posts: 728
There is definitely good material there for you to work with.

There's nothing wrong with wanting to be built and strong and doing it, but the emotional charge and associations of weakness, shame and so on can be addressed internally and NO you don't have to change anything external in order to go in and look at them.

The difference in how people treat you in the different scenarios has much more to do with your vastly different inner state and the vibe it puts out, then your mind would have you believe. Sure there are some external factors in how people treat you but if you tap into the feeling itself and explore it, the feeling does not actually come from muscles or anything external. Just a lot of attachments and aversions going on. You can feel good about yourself AND have muscles, not BECAUSE you have them and you are shit without them.

_________________
http://www.innerreconciliation.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 10:22 pm 
Offline

Joined: Fri Sep 28, 2012 7:22 pm
Posts: 211
Yes Flow i want to get to a point where my happiness on my body image is not dependant on whether or not i have muscles in certain which accentuate my baldness and protect me from my perceived aversion of being simultaneously thin and bald.If there was some kind of crisis in the world that would not allow me to eat enough calories to support the muscles than i would be left with being thin and bald.I'm not saying it would happen but just inviting the possibility to trigger myself.In order to accept being thin and bald it would seem to me the only way to do this is stop lifting lose my muscles, make myself feel the aversions of feeling thin and bald and going out in public exposing myself to the ugly associations i have created in my mind,the sensations,desensitizing and exposing myself by putting myself in the situation where i feel ugly..thoughts?


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 10:40 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Apr 10, 2010 5:51 pm
Posts: 1579
Location: Laniakea Supercluster
Quote:
"All created forms are fractal, as is their purpose, use, and allotted time for existence."

-----Guy Finley

_________________
"When values are clear, decisions are easy." ---Dan Peña


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 10:48 pm 
Offline

Joined: Fri Sep 28, 2012 7:22 pm
Posts: 211
Hey Jared i was curious is that the approach you take with only doing boulders once or twice a week.I imagine you don't lift weights anymore.I was thinking of doing this too as it it will force me to know worry about where the muscles are being distributed.Letting the chips fall where they may.When you throw boulders i am sure the satisfication of knowing you are a stronger version of your physical self is merely enough,setting aside worrying if specific parts are growing enough.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 10:59 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sat Apr 10, 2010 5:51 pm
Posts: 1579
Location: Laniakea Supercluster
perfect boulders, rumble rumble, thud!

_________________
"When values are clear, decisions are easy." ---Dan Peña


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Nov 26, 2015 6:15 am 
Offline

Joined: Tue Sep 25, 2012 6:50 am
Posts: 3
Thanks for the advice guys


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Nov 26, 2015 10:29 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sat Feb 18, 2012 3:35 pm
Posts: 739
I don't know man, to me it seems like you're trying to fix/outmaneuver this feeling of "I don't fit in and that bothers me immensly". Most of your posts have just been different remixes of that song.

There is no spoo....baldness.

_________________
Take it easy, man. But take it.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Nov 26, 2015 10:56 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sun Sep 11, 2011 9:02 am
Posts: 188
caliboy wrote:
When i see these guys who are bald it makes me see ugliness in myself which is one of the main reasons why i go to the gym

http://www.moby.com/sites/default/files ... launch.jpg

http://40.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m9xjf ... 1_1280.jpg

http://s1.tvequals.com/tv/up/2010/11/Jim-Rash.jpg

None of these guys strike me as particularly ugly. Sure a look like that can be very nerdy. But a lot of it depends on how this person would move and behave. His posture and the way he walks, talks and goes through life.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Nov 26, 2015 2:36 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Oct 06, 2010 2:06 am
Posts: 1165
Location: Foundation/Root
I am bald like all the guys he showed...
not crying.

_________________
"I'd rather have no bitch than a half a bitch" Iceberg Slim


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Fri Nov 27, 2015 1:21 am 
Offline

Joined: Thu Dec 02, 2010 4:16 am
Posts: 724
Point is , how can you lift if you have no hands.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Fri Nov 27, 2015 9:23 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Sun Sep 11, 2011 9:02 am
Posts: 188
LOL! None of these guys have hands! :shock:


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 49 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3  Next

All times are UTC [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group