Natural Freedom

Forum for the natural awakening and self-realization of men
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 06, 2015 7:18 pm 
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It's so deceivingly simple. Hang out and devote your energy to people that want to hang with you. Pay no mind to those that don't.

So why don't we do it? Why have I done this inconsistenly up to this point? It's weird, trying to convince people that you are worthy of their attention and focus. And oftentimes, it leads you to neglect the very relationships that you try to reach with those that simply don't like you for who you are (or aren't).

I believe it's to prove that you are worthy of existence. I took all the hate thrown my way personally and saw it as an objective judge of my worthiness for life. Ignored those that showed me the opposite, for whatever reason. And so I had to prove everyone that I was fit to be here, "knowing" the whole time that I was deceiving them. It just felt wrong and I felt like a facade of a human being.

This forum isn't about identifying the behavior patterns that lead you to convince other people they should like you. Not to mention the effect that mindset has on your perception of your own value (the very thing you're trying to convince other people of), but it's such an unfullfilling way to live. You know what I'm talking about - the hole that gets left in your soul when you compromise on yourself to hopefully see that which you compromised reflected back at you from another person. Just mind-bogglingly ass-backwards.

We're all meant to be here because we are here. There's no need to justify it, no need to prove it. There's such a gigantic difference between working at something because you want to be as good as you can be, and doing it to avoid criticism and to fit in.

The fact is people will not like you, or the energy you put out. And it's not like they're wrong and that you're right. There is no right and wrong there, it's just two different perceptions of one thing. There's no need for them to match. If they do, fantastic - spending time with like-minded people is really cool. If they don't, whatever - maybe you take something away from it, maybe you don't, either way you're all good.

Take me, for example. I felt like such a sack of shit because I'm the black sheep of my family - I rap, do almost every sport, have quite a bit of my body covered with tattoos, assume respect but don't think people should just be given it continously if they aren't earning it (and don't respect me) and am interested in doubting the world and finding the truth. I have 3 jobs alongside school, which pushes me to my limits (just got my bacherlor's degree, but there were times when I doubted whether I'd manage to graduate) and oftentimes tests my sanity. Oh, and I love to experiment with psychadelics. Basically the polar opposite of what my family stands for - caution, fitting in to society, not angering others too much, listening to your elders, and not trusting the youth. And definitely not rap (my entire family is still telling me it's not music) :lol:

And I felt bad about myself! I felt bad about not being like them. I felt horrible that I fucked with their worldview, and always tried to keep a low profile because of that. Lordy, the foolishness of it. And yet, it gave me the experience I needed to look within, starting me on a path of self-discovery and self-acceptance.

So do you. And if you are to realize what "you" actually represents, then you have to do it independently of others. You have to know it might mean quite a bit of hateful stares, snide remarks, and bitterness. And not judge it or condemn it. Not everyone is as enlightened as you :lol:

Because how else are you going to discover the like-minded? And how else will you give other people the confidence to express what you're expressing, starting them on the path of self-discovery and self-acceptance?

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 09, 2015 2:31 pm 
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I enjoyed reading that. You seem to have changed a lot comapred to your posts from say one year ago. Looks like you put some real good work into it.

There is a lot of acceptance in between the lines you wrote.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 13, 2015 12:28 pm 
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Quote:
It's so deceivingly simple. Hang out and devote your energy to people that want to hang with you. Pay no mind to those that don't.

So why don't we do it? Why have I done this inconsistenly up to this point? It's weird, trying to convince people that you are worthy of their attention and focus.
Quote:
I believe it's to prove that you are worthy of existence.
I believe it comes from a deep biological "need" to be accepted by the group. I have been looking deep into myself lately and I have come to the conclusion that all my needy behaviour in the end comes down to wanting to be accepted. Even if there is only one person in the group that doesn't accept me. From a biological point of view being kicked out of the group/tribe/family could (eventually) mean that you are going to die.

This would be especially true for young children. But even for adults life is much easier if you get help from the tribe. Surviving together is easier than surviving on your own. So not being acepted by one person triggers an automatic biological response to win that persons approval.

I am not saying you should act on this impulse! It is just something to be aware of. So that you can consciously have the choice to act on it or not. I don't believe this biological impulse will ever go away for 100%, because deep down inside it is a matter of survival.


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 13, 2015 11:56 pm 
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Location: Laniakea Supercluster
Gonzo wrote:
But even for adults life is much easier if you get help from the tribe. Surviving together is easier than surviving on your own.
The 7 dwarfs long to be long

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