Natural Freedom

I am going to focus on improving myself and getting my shit together and not worry about women for now.If my sexual urges gets to the point where i feel like i absolutely can't live without it i can always hire an escort but for now i will focus on getting my shit together.

I know this may sound crazy but im just not in a good state of mind right now.

no.
reason, because you are still operating in a trick/simp mind frame.

get rid of that " if my urges get the better of me then I'll just buy some sex" type of thinking.

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"I'd rather have no bitch than a half a bitch" Iceberg Slim

I don't know man i am trying not to pay for sex which is why i am trying out the online dating.Shit is depressing even girls in the 4-5 range are not replying to my messages and its starting to make feel like either there is something wrong with me or american women just don't like men who look like me.I know what you guys are thinking why do you care what they think and you shouldn't be approaching women online since you are filling in space, however, when girls 1 to 2 points below you in the looks department are not replying its a tough pill to swallow.In the back of my head i am think wouldn't wtf is wrong with you don't you want someone who is better looking than you to have sex with you? shit is frusterating. Here is my profile.Again, i am not in a good state of mind when writing this but i just have to put it out there because its been on my mind.

Yes when reading this one can sense desperation and neediness but its the truth.

http://www.okcupid.com/profile/davsey

Exhibit A:
Using your own words - "desperation and neediness" are a big part of your problem. Seeing escorts will not solve that problem. Getting chicks from online will not solve that problem. NO GIRL WILL EVER SOLVE THAT PROBLEM.

Stop looking for a girl/girls to fill a hole that you have in yourself.

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"The society gives you a map; I give you only freedom. The society gives you character, I give you only consciousness. The society teaches you to live a conformist life ... I give you an invitation to go on an adventure." - Osho

You're saying that busting a nut inside of a sexy girl will not satiety my desperation?I agree with that.But wouldn't you say it would satiety my horniness?

I

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EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING.

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!

CAN'T

_________________
EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING.

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!

EVEN

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EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING.

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!

Cali, I'm, I'm, I'm,...I'm really trying to master patience, but it's either you are not looking or maybe you just can't see.

Personally, I'd say Kill the page.
and you NEED To practice self Discipline!
nobody is perfect but dude, come on, something is holding you back. you know what it is but you keep avoid pinpointing it.

oh yeah, Kill the fucking page.
even the people that shit was designed for stay away from it.

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"I'd rather have no bitch than a half a bitch" Iceberg Slim

What these guys said ^^.

-----------------------

But here's my best effort:

There is physical desire. Desire is natural - desires arise, and then fade away on their own. Coming, going, coming, going. The physical desire never lasts for very long, although it may come more frequently or less frequently.

Then there is attachment to desire - there is craving for what you desire, and this can be very persistant.

This is the first layer that gets placed on top of the physical sensation - your mind decides that it wants whatever you desire and that you will not be happy or satisfied unless you get what you desire. Notice how when you get hungry, the sensation of hunger comes first, and then only after you have experienced the sensation of hunger does your mind jump in and label it as "hunger" and decide that you need to do something about it, and how if you don't do something about it that's not going to be an acceptable situation.

Notice how if you do nothing about your hunger, in time (seconds? minutes? more?) the sensation of hunger will fade away. It will surely come back, but it will also surely come back again even if you do eat. Its the idea that you are hungry and have to do something about it that stays.

Then on top of that, your mind starts putting a second layer of meaning, a third layer, and more and more layers on top of that.

With women, this could be the idea that unless you get chicks who are "1-2 points below you" to sleep with you then you must be a failure of some sort.

Or it could be the idea that American women just don't like men who look like you.

Etc.

-----------------------------------

To answer your question more directly:

No sleeping with a woman will not satiate your horniness.

Typically horniness is comprised of the physical desire and all the layers of meaning and attachment and craving that you have built on top of it.

So sleeping with a woman may seem to remove the physical desire, but it will not do anything for the additional layers.

Furthermore, if you really pay attention, the physical desire comes and goes on its own without needing you to sleep with a woman in order for it to disappear. Its all the other layers that really make the horniness persist.

You may still try to rationalize that "busting a nut inside a sexy girl" will rid you of the physical sensation, at least for a period of time, but look at your rationalization really closely. Is your desire to "bust a nut inside the sexy girl" really all about the physical sensation, or does it have all sorts of layers of meaning built on top of it?

If it doesn't, then why does it matter if she is a sexy girl or not?

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"The society gives you a map; I give you only freedom. The society gives you character, I give you only consciousness. The society teaches you to live a conformist life ... I give you an invitation to go on an adventure." - Osho

You didn't even make it to the end of the POST without taking it back to women !

You are addicted to seeking approval/validation etc. and thinking about women. Note that word -- addicted. Don't beat yourself up for it, you and an alarmingly high percentage of the population.

Treat it with the respect it deserves. Would you expect to cure heroin addiction by "stop giving a shit" or reading forums? This type of thinking is like heroin except it is FREE and ALWAYS available.

To say "i'm not focusing on this right now" is inherently focusing on it. You are genuinely not focused on becoming a professional cricket player right now- women, yes.

It will eat away at you until you face what you actually want to get from women, to prove to yourself, etc. on a deep level that you have projected on to them. There is no escaping it - period. Life is very persistent in this way. It will keep shaking you until you wake up or die.

I recommend confronting it directly and not pretend you are not focused on them anymore (suppression)

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zTXz8xMaJi4

Meraki

I dont know about the layers but i will tell you from observation that when i see a chick that i find physically attracivet to me i get horny.Chemical reactions in my brain signal to get hard automatically.My horniness doesnt respond to her personality or friendly aura it doesnt matter if i dont feel horny around them.Do.you think.i.will benefit.from.a.90. Day no.masturbation no.porn.fast?One.thing i.do.notice.is.that i.am.attracted.physicly to.bitchy sexy white girls.with those ditsy volleyball.voices almost like.a fetish even.if.they are.bitchy im.sexually.attacted to.them..Do you.think a.porn.masturbation.fast will.help.unassociate these neural.connections?or.are they purely.biogical.and.not.learned?

And? I never said that reaction wouldn't happen. What I said was that the reaction isn't 100% physical. The horniness is some amount of physical desire and some amount of additional meaning layered on top of it.
I never said anything about her personality. The layers I'm talking about are YOUR layers that YOU create in YOUR OWN MIND. They have nothing to do with what she is actually like. Look at what you wrote earlier:
Fact - you sent a message off into space and nothing came back. Everything else is your interpretation, your meaning. The whole part about her being a 4-5 is your interpretation. The whole part about it being depressing that nothing came back is the meaning you are assigning to it in your own head. It has nothing to do with the actual girl (if there is actually a real girl on the other end that is receiving your message).
They are 100% learned. Nobody is born with a built in attraction to bitchy white girls.

As for the fast - do you think it would help you?

I'm not going to tell you yes or no. You have to take a hard look at yourself and decide for yourself.

I can tell you that many other guys have done it and found it very worthwhile. See AlexJ's and TheDude's recent posts on it.

viewtopic.php?f=19&t=2906
viewtopic.php?f=3&t=3318

I'm also going to emphasize a couple of Flow's points to make sure you don't miss them because they are very important:

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"The society gives you a map; I give you only freedom. The society gives you character, I give you only consciousness. The society teaches you to live a conformist life ... I give you an invitation to go on an adventure." - Osho

Here's something useful about my past that maybe you guys can help me with

These incidents may sound bizarre and its my first time sharing all of them.I hope it will get me closer to figuring out my attachment to sex.

1.When i was about 14 years old, I use to wait till my Aunt went to sleep(she was sharing rooms and living with my parents at the time) and curl up behind her while she was asleep and ejecalute.It only took me a few seconds and i felt relieved.Eventually,she caught me doing this and switched rooms.I would wait till she fell asleep and sneak in her room.Sometimes i would hide under her bed until she came into the room and wait for her to turn the lights off and fall asleep,and i would do the same thing.I did get caught a few times but most of the time i got away with it.Any oppurtunity i got even when she was laying on the sofa, i would curl up behind when she's not paying attention and bust a nut with my clothers on.These days everytime i see a big butt i have that craving.

2.When i was in High school around the same age one day after school when i was waiting to be picked up from my parents there was this girl also waiting for her ride.She was kind of thick.I went up to her and asked her if she minds if i feel up on her ass(I had no fear of her saying no can't explain it) and she said ok i don't care.So i hugged her from behind and pressed my crotch behind her ass.Eventually,i pulled my dick out and she said what are you doing and i said nothing.She didn't resist or seem to mind but i continued to press up against her anyways.I enjoyed the sensation very much.


3.When i was very young, i use to get annoyed by my father's voice.There was a certain sound he made that was very irritating and annoying.Sometime i would even tell him to be quiet.Eventually,i felt like cumming and i did.I don't know how it happened.I didn't even jack off.To this day i have no explanation for this.

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“I learned this, at least, by my experiment; that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours. . . ."

-Thoreau's Walden

This really goes way beyond my formal training as a member of an internet forum.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zTXz8xMaJi4

_________________
EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING.

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!

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GMST

Here, wait just a sec...
Fixed!

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"The society gives you a map; I give you only freedom. The society gives you character, I give you only consciousness. The society teaches you to live a conformist life ... I give you an invitation to go on an adventure." - Osho

So you guys suggest therapy? How can i find one that is not a feminist/Matrix brainswashed and will attempt to just focus on keeping me away from women/the community out of fear, rather than really help me get to the core issues?