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 Post subject: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Sun Jun 16, 2013 12:26 am 
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I recently finished a 90 day challenge inspired by this (thanks AlexJ and Pere):
viewtopic.php?f=19&t=2906

It was a mental boot camp of sorts. :geek:
Difficult, depressing, energetic, powerful, sad, lonely, and...a list of other emotions.
But, when all the distractions are gone, the 'problems' have nowhere to hide.

Things I took away:
a) There are vibes people unconsciously pick up on; my libido was on high gear and had a lot of energy…certain women could sense it.
b) I don’t need a women or anyone for that matter in a life.
c) Sex is pleasurable, not a means to boost my esteem or ego anymore.

It was a great ride and journey, those three months. My last night, spent it with myself of course. It was pleasant.

Then…I saw a girl.
She's younger than me, but down to earth. Met her on a bus, in which she initiated the conversation.
Fast forward and for the first time before sex or anything I laid the framework of the relationship out to her.
I found out what she was looking for, boyfriend. :roll:
Rather then bs my way, "maybe down the line it could happen", I snipped it in the bud quickly.

Her: What're you looking for:
Dude: Non-exclusive dating, nothing serious you know.
Her: Oh, ok.
Dude: :D

She didn't dig it at first.
Guess what though it didn't bug me.
She could go or stay.
Guess what happened.
She stayed, and wanted me even more.

While hanging out though she was trying to get us to be more with her actions and content. I'm impressed by what I picked up from here. I could read past her words, and really read her messages, and why she was doing what she was doing.
She consciously was trying to put herself in my life more.
I was surprised. I was dodging her blows in slow-mo; Matrix style.
If I didn't read and reread all the stuff here, I would've got played into a situation I didn't want.
She threw a list of emotions at me, but nothing stuck.
I told her specifically I was not looking for a girlfriend, and on our second meeting she get's all deep and emotional with me. :roll:
If I didn't have my foundation straight I would've felt a range of emotions and probably felt it my OBLIGATION to help this girl.
"Oh shes a girl, she needs help. I need to help her, or I'm not a good guy," type of deal.

I also seeked out to know her sexual health. She get's tested and SAID she was NOT sleeping with anyone else.
My gut grew suspicious. Things did not add up.
A little nervous and not fully confident, I disregarded my gut feeling.
We went on and hooked up.

It came up later somehow, she was talking about the other guy who she was seeing as potential bf.
I asked her if she slept with him, she paused, yes.
I was :evil: .
Not of jealousy or envy. Out of her putting my health at risk.
I told her what was on my mind, and it wasn't cool.
I let her know if she ever was dishonest with me again it was over.
We'll see what happens.
She did what guys usually do though, lie to get some ass. :lol: 8-)
Felt good and eased the anger.
Said she didn't know how to say it, and she never really had an open relationship before.

Moral of the story: LISTEN TO YOUR GUT.
_________________________________________________________________________

NOW...the very interesting part for me.
People come into your life at times for a reason...
You guys will help one another out in a way if your in tune with it
Or, it could be a parasitic relationship. Who knows.

Her journey resembles mine. Not the content exactly, but the journey itself.
When I made the observation of our resemblance I laughed at how funny life can be.
And, I could have EASILY missed this observation if I wasn't aware.
It's strange, when I listen to her talk sometimes, when she's emotional and where's the victim mask, I see myself, sort of, from not too long ago.
Trippy. Gave me a chill when I first realized it.

Little background on this girl for the stories sake
She's got emotional issues and hangups
Stuck on the past; victim mentality
Wants guidance, wants to be happy
Facing her demons
She moved out recently. Lonely. Sad. Doing bad with school and confused in life.

I felt the same thing, a little different, but same shit really.
I could see my journey in her.
Where she is now, is similar to where I was back then.

We came into each others life and we could help each other in ways we may not even know or understand yet.
She said she needs some guidance, so I'm down to give some.
I'm going to calculate my guidance, and not rope myself and set myself up for this girl getting attached to me.
Always breaking the illusion that she may need me.

My reason's for wanting to guide her:
a) When she unleashed her victim stories on me. I could see through all of them, mostly, and identify the core issues. (Also reminded of me and how much I held onto the past)
b) Journey's are alike.
c) It will be fulfilling to see her grow if she does take the guidance (i wanted to be a therapist early in life)
d) In guiding her I may or may not learn some things myself.
peregrinus wrote:
roark wrote:
And on and on it went, with the 'teacher' and 'student' roles switching constantly
This reminded me of :

The teacher is the one who gets the most out of the lessons, and the true teacher is the learner

--

The moment a teacher stops learning from the students they are lost.

Hence all teachers are students and all students are teachers....

In an ideal world.
What she really want(s), besides my dick :twisted:, is either someone to listen to her stories or some actual guidance.
Either a good friendship will form, or it won't.

I'm curious to know if others have ever had any such experience with such a thing, such a girl, or both.
I''ll see where it goes.


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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Sun Jun 16, 2013 1:01 am 
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Excellent :ugeek:

...and she is your mirror...which means you already have all the tools you need to deal with and guide her as you see fit. 8-)

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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Sun Jun 16, 2013 8:54 am 
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Bravo

and dat stuff Kidz sayz

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In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.


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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Sun Jun 16, 2013 3:17 pm 
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Congrats man! Well done :mrgreen:

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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 12:24 pm 
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Your challenge did you very well, congrats.

You know what to do. ;)

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"Simply put, you being in her life is a BLESSING. Her wronging you in any way is her own self-inflicted CURSE, and if she does wrong you, then let the punishment fit the crime. Her life will absolutely SUCK without you."


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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 9:53 pm 
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Fucking beautiful. :mrgreen:

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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Wed Jun 19, 2013 6:04 am 
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Thanks fellas!
It's something else seeing your work pay-off.
The Kidd!! wrote:
...and she is your mirror...
Exactly what it felt like. Gave me some goose bumps and a laugh.


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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Thu Jun 20, 2013 11:35 am 
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Why struggle(?)

If you already are the person who could do it
before you even begin, why would you struggle(?)


Grand! Enjoyed reading!

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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Thu Jun 20, 2013 10:46 pm 
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Jared wrote:
Why struggle(?)

If you already are the person who could do it
before you even begin, why would you struggle(?)
Because, sometimes I enjoy making life difficult for myself and testing if I am strong. ;)


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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Thu Jun 20, 2013 11:12 pm 
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TheDude wrote:
Because, sometimes I enjoy making life difficult for myself and testing if I am strong. ;)[/quote]

Can´t show anyone something they don´t already know,
and won´t be able to show anyone something new until they
know it.
8-)

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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 12:24 am 
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Jared wrote:
Can´t show anyone something they don´t already know,
and won´t be able to show anyone something new until they
know it.
8-)
I'll let this sink in.


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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Fri Jun 28, 2013 7:32 am 
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UPDATE:

I've got a good assessment of where this girl is and where she is headed. I had a sit down with her and laid out the framework if this was to go forward.

Firstly, my feelings on our sexual relationships was on hold. We had a good time on our visits, but I needed to see if this girl was serious about guidance, or just using it to keep me around for my dick and my abilities. ;)

I didn't want a person in my life wasting my time.
I felt as though sex would dilute the content of my messages, which I learned from here and myself. :geek:

Funny thing is I debriefed my sister about this girl and my plans, she knows what she needed to know, my sister. Her advice about the sex was: "it's good, you guys can still have sex. The sex will bond your message even more." :roll:

That's a possibility, but it also opens up to the chance of a strong clinger, but I let my sister know it would only give her the wrong message(s) and going away from what I want. She would get good sex from me and great guidance. A perfect mix to stir stronger feelings for me; that is NOT what I want. It would take a strong woman to separate the two and see our relationship for what it would be (fwb & guidance); this girl is not there yet.

Lesson from the above, don't follow women's advice about women.
(Kidd mentioned it before, you're in the wrong place if you're seeking guidance about girls from girls.)

As we met today we went over a quick debrief. I'm not in her life to be her life-line. My guidance is not "directions" or "do this and not that". I'm only here for my thoughts and comments. The rest is up to her and where she wants to go.

Like here, my message is: I want you to be able to stand on your own two feet as the end of the day. In the end, you won't need me.

I gave her a decision after our lengthy conversation: Our relationship will either be, a purely sexual relationship OR one of guidance and platonic friendship.

She choice the right one in my opinion; guidance it is.

On the whole today, this experience was amazing! Amazing at the fact that a few months ago I wouldn't even think of laying something like this out, being at a place to do such a thing, AND having it on MY terms. Don't get the wrong image, I'm not bullet proof or rock solid yet. Much work is still in the mix. I'm just a little better equipped in The Matrix now. 8-)

I am enjoying what this experience is turning out to be. :D

I'll keep posting updates when things turn over.


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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Fri Jun 28, 2013 5:14 pm 
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If you follow through...she's gonna throw that pussy at you SO...HARD. :twisted:

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EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING. :ugeek:

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!


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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Fri Jun 28, 2013 6:28 pm 
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The Kidd!! wrote:
If you follow through...she's gonna throw that pussy at you SO...HARD. :twisted:
She was doing that before too.
I was busy with work and things I wanted to do that I didn't see her for a week or so.
Result, she was chasing me, texting me when she could see me, etc.

But, maybe it will be thrown at me on a WHOLE NEW LEVEL?!


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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Fri Jun 28, 2013 6:31 pm 
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Quote:
But, maybe it will be thrown at me on a WHOLE NEW LEVEL?!
Maybe my ass! :lol:

Prepare yourself...for you have yet to witness firsthand just how sexually persuasive, determined and FORWARD the female sex can truly be. :twisted:

_________________
EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING. :ugeek:

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!


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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Sat Jun 29, 2013 3:12 am 
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The Kidd!! wrote:
Quote:
But, maybe it will be thrown at me on a WHOLE NEW LEVEL?!
Maybe my ass! :lol:

Prepare yourself...for you have yet to witness firsthand just how sexually persuasive, determined and FORWARD the female sex can truly be. :twisted:
Ohhhh boy! :D :twisted:


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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Sat Jun 29, 2013 3:34 am 
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For full effect...wait till she is damn near trying to rape you then tell her what women normally tell men:

"Bu-bu-but...but you said you only wanted to be FRIENDS! I don't understand where all of this is coming from!" :lol: :twisted:

_________________
EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING. :ugeek:

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!


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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Sat Jun 29, 2013 4:19 am 
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who the Hell is this Dude :shock: :lol:

Have fun with this, your experience points are going to go off the chainzzzz, if you continue on your "Chosen Path" :mrgreen:

she Opted for Guidance, guidance of your chakras into her chakras :lol: :twisted:

I think I should do the 90 day detox for "other" reasons too :ugeek

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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Sat Jun 29, 2013 5:54 am 
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TheDude wrote:
The Kidd!! wrote:
Quote:
But, maybe it will be thrown at me on a WHOLE NEW LEVEL?!
Maybe my ass! :lol:

Prepare yourself...for you have yet to witness firsthand just how sexually persuasive, determined and FORWARD the female sex can truly be. :twisted:
Ohhhh boy! :D :twisted:

You say that now ;) ...give it time.

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"The heart is deep beyond all things, and it is the man. Even so, who can know him."


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 Post subject: Re: 90 days and after
PostPosted: Sat Jun 29, 2013 9:49 am 
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The Kidd!! wrote:
"Bu-bu-but...but you said you only wanted to be FRIENDS! I don't understand where all of this is coming from!" :lol: :twisted:
:twisted:

_________________
In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.


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