Natural Freedom
http://naturalfreedom.info/

Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
http://naturalfreedom.info/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=2614		 Page 1 of 2
Author:  TheDude [ Mon Oct 01, 2012 8:44 pm ]
Post subject:  Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
So, I met this girl at a piercing shop. We kicked it for two days, and had a good interaction. I'm busy and so is she, so, we haven't seen each other for a good week now. However, she's been texting me all the time. I "asked" her when she was free in the week, and she told me she was busy; ok that's fine.

There was a free Concert Sunday in our city and I asked her if she wanted to join. She said looks cool, but has work in the morning, and isn't sure if she could go. She doesn't let me know if she could go or not; pissed me off a little. She texted me saturday night "Whatchu doin tonight?" . I was at a music festival and didn't answer,

Last night she after the concert she texts me:

Her: How was the concert?
Me: It was alright ;)
Her: Jus alright?
Me: it was great (include a pic of the event)
Her: How was your week :)
Me: ( I didn't answer; I was drained and sleepy)
Her: Hang out with me again :)
Me: (In the morning) I "guess" we could do that ;)
Her: Psh fine be that way

:lol:

Did I fuck up somewhere? I was being aloof and showing less than her. I feel like she's "testing" me right now. I haven't responded back; thought I would get some others, who are more experienced, to further analyze this. :geek:
Author:  Mikey swag [ Mon Oct 01, 2012 10:48 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
I don't think you fucked up because she still wants to get together with you. But you want to create a sense of urgency for her to see you and over communication kills it.
Author:  The Kidd!! [ Mon Oct 01, 2012 11:06 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
Space is the place...and you aren't giving enough. :geek:
Author:  Flow83 [ Mon Oct 01, 2012 11:07 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
She was actually the one to say "get to the point" (let's hang out)

To me even the second text is her saying "HELLO, i'm trying to hook up with you here"

Instead of naming time and place to get together, you took it BACK into "let's joke around w/ cute comments" mode.

You don't really need to be trying to communicate stuff when a girl is saying "come sleep with me" IMHO.

Less is more.
Author:  peregrinus [ Mon Oct 01, 2012 11:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
TheDude: I am not sure you have decided where you want to take this, so what is she meant to think?

If you havent decided, how is she meant to know what you have decided.

You are coming across as either not sure OR lacking some balls.

You are contacting her then pussy footing around.. Mixed messages?

Tell me I am wrong
Author:  TheDude [ Mon Oct 01, 2012 11:40 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
The Kidd!! wrote:
Space is the place...and you aren't giving enough. :geek:
Was I not giving enough, by responding back to her daily texts? She was txting me, what was I supposed to do.

Flow83 wrote:
Instead of naming time and place to get together, you took it BACK into "let's joke around w/ cute comments" mode.
Yes, but with Pimp Tight Mentality I was under the impression that we give space to the girl to "ask us out"; not us asking her out (we are the prize, not her).
peregrinus wrote:
TheDude: I am not sure you have decided where you want to take this, so what is she meant to think?

If you havent decided, how is she meant to know what you have decided.

You are coming across as either not sure OR lacking some balls.

You are contacting her then pussy footing around.. Mixed messages?

Tell me I am wrong
I wish I could say you're wrong. :oops:
Author:  Alchemist [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 12:38 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
Something to think about:
Star_Above wrote:
The minute you think "She's different, she's nicer so I can invest more" is the minute she becomes just like every other girl you've wanted and they didn't want you because you wanted them.
Star_Above wrote:
Don't use it as a technique, you can't fool mother nature.
Author:  Flow83 [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 12:44 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
Quote:
Was I not giving enough, by responding back to her daily texts? She was txting me, what was I supposed to do.
Not answer or get to the point - you, in my experience, actually got a rare softball where she was the one to take it there, "ok, fuck it, i'll just say it, COME HANG OUT WITH ME" - ie, dude, i'm trying to hint that i want to get together with you, will you stop engaging the chatty texts and get the clue.
Quote:
Yes, but with Pimp Tight Mentality I was under the impression that we give space to the girl to "ask us out"; not us asking her out (we are the prize, not her).
While I am not familiar with the pimp mentality like the other gentlemen here who could speak to that, "come hang out with me", ready very carefully, sounds like a girl is asking you to go 'hang out' with her - some might call that 'she asked you out' ;)
Author:  The Kidd!! [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 1:15 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
She's jerking your chain...power play. :geek:

...and you blew it when you told her you guess you could hang out. :lol:
Author:  TheDude [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 1:17 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
@Flow ~ she pretty much did ask me out. In my head though IM THROUGH CHASING GIRLS! Why couldn't she just say: come over, or, wanna hangout tomorrow?
Author:  StephenP [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 1:25 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
The Kidd!! wrote:
She's jerking your chain...power play. :geek:
This is what I initially thought.

My advice would have been to lay way back if you guys had such a good weekend together initially. Short answers to any 'chit chat' texts or no answer at all depending on what your gut says. Eventually it would drive her crazy and she would be compelled to pursue you and ask you out.

EDIT: or maybe she wouldn't ask you out and there's your answer - minus all the effort and stressin' 8-)
Author:  TheDude [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 1:39 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
The Kidd!! wrote:
She's jerking your chain...power play. :geek:

...and you blew it when you told her you guess you could hang out. :lol:
I see. How would you have acted.

@StephenP ~ Should of listened to my gut.

Shitty day today and this is just adding to it! :x

I haven't responded to her last text. Should I drop her; not respond and let her reinitiate?

I was thinking of texting her : I want you. Had a shitty day today :( (I'm being direct and have intent?)
Letting her know I like her; is this sympish?
Author:  StephenP [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 1:47 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
TheDude wrote:
I was thinking of texting her : I want you. Had a shitty day today :( (I'm being direct and have intent?)
Letting her know I like her; is this sympish?
Please don't

Or do...In the name of science :mrgreen:
Author:  TheDude [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 1:52 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
StephenP wrote:
TheDude wrote:
I was thinking of texting her : I want you. Had a shitty day today :( (I'm being direct and have intent?)
Letting her know I like her; is this sympish?
Please don't
:lol: :lol: oh boy!!!

I was having a crap day, but it's getting better chatting with you guys.
Author:  Resonance [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 2:21 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
TheDude wrote:
@Flow ~ she pretty much did ask me out. In my head though IM THROUGH CHASING GIRLS! Why couldn't she just say: come over, or, wanna hangout tomorrow?
She did invite you out, from my experience and what I gathered from it she probably would've left that decision up to you decide the day, time, and place. She was basically letting you lead home boy
Author:  The Kidd!! [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 2:24 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
Resonance wrote:
TheDude wrote:
@Flow ~ she pretty much did ask me out. In my head though IM THROUGH CHASING GIRLS! Why couldn't she just say: come over, or, wanna hangout tomorrow?
She did invite you out, from my experience and what I gathered from it she probably would've left that decision up to you decide the day, time, and place. She was basically letting you lead home boy
Nope...she's setting an ego trap. 8-)
Author:  Flow83 [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 4:40 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
Interesting. Can see I was assuming a lot of things and not looking at the whole context, and even then may not have seen it.

IMHO when there is 'text chatting' and convo's, especially where you are engaging in them but doing the "i'm intentionally trying to say stuff that sounds like I'm kind of aloof" (if it sounds harsh it's directed at older version of myself :) ), then you are in a whole different zone so to speak.

I will say that my world around this stuff transformed when I actually began dropping the attachment, combined with being busy enough, that not engaging anything except directly what I wanted became something that just 'happened' and was no longer thinking about it as some kind of technique. This also could mean literally months of no communication, something I would never have done if I was *trying* to not communicate and thinking about it. It's not really even patience at that point, because you have let it go out of your agenda.

EDIT: btw, not sure if this would change TheKidd's response either way, but I was assuming you two had slept together and that "hang out with me again" was a "let's do that again" ...
Author:  The Kidd!! [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 4:50 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
Quote:
Interesting. Can see I was assuming a lot of things and not looking at the whole context, and even then may not have seen it.
You didn't...I didn't get this perceptive overnight, you know. ;)
Quote:
It's not really even patience at that point, because you have let it go out of your agenda.
Yup...and at that point...it's what I like to call TRUE INDIFFERENCE...the ULTIMATE trump card for men in the battle of the sexes. :ugeek:
Author:  TheDude [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 5:29 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
The Kidd!! wrote:
Resonance wrote:
TheDude wrote:
@Flow ~ she pretty much did ask me out. In my head though IM THROUGH CHASING GIRLS! Why couldn't she just say: come over, or, wanna hangout tomorrow?
She did invite you out, from my experience and what I gathered from it she probably would've left that decision up to you decide the day, time, and place. She was basically letting you lead home boy
Nope...she's setting an ego trap. 8-)
Was the ego trap her stating "hangout with me again :)" from there I would have responded with: "ya wanna hangout tomorrow" or some shit, but doing that would be have given her the power?

p.s. When she said "hangout with me again" I thought why the fudge she wouldn't say "I WANT to hangout with YOU again :)". One of the first giveaways that she wasn't as invested in me as I thought.
Author:  The Kidd!! [ Tue Oct 02, 2012 5:47 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where is this going? (Texting Girl)
So guess who's invested? ;)

...AND you're projecting harder than IMAX. :lol:
Page 1 of 2 All times are UTC+01:00
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Limited
https://www.phpbb.com/