Cindy M. Meston-Why Women Have Sex: Understanding Sexual Motivations from Adventure to Revenge
This is a good book. This heavily analytical work attempts to breaks down the what's, when's, whos, how's and why's of female sexual motivation. The first is the best chapter. It breaks the
basic of what turns women on based on a study of several thousand women. You make could a checklist based on this chapter alone to how easily you be would chosen right off the bat. The rest of the book examines other reason why females have sex from fear "mate poaching" to tradeing and "Bartering" sex oft services. (Tell me your suprised!)
Here are the Top 50 Reasons Why Women Have Sex
…according to Cindy M. Meston and David M. Buss <<extracted from the document:
http://homepage.psy.utexas.edu/homepage ... 202007.pdf >>
Basically, in terms of improving your abilities, you just need to know how to get WOMEN turned on.
Although, the experiment uncovered 237 reasons, it’s best just to focus on the Top 50.
First of all, I love this list! If you’re a guy who is married (regardless of how great the sex life is, you should look at this list EVERY DAY! (ingrain it into your unconscious mind)
However there is a problem with this list (to me). I don’t understand how they missed it, but it could have been categorized better. For example, #2 “I wanted to experience the physical pleasure” and #3 “It feels good” are basically the same. I know it can be challenging to decipher someone’s intention behind their statement, but you could make the case that 4 & 5 are the same, too.
If you go though it, you’ll spot some more, but it’s still an amazing list.
Let’s talk about how to use the information, but first let’s put it in perspective by understanding a few tips.
Tip #1: There are “missing reasons” in this list, because it’s only capable of revealing what these women THINK are the reasons – in addition to how (intentionally or unintentionally) honest they are being…
Tip #2: Realize that every item on this list can be classified into 2 basic groups:
An URGE_BASED DESIRE - where the predominant driver is to fulfill an unconscious desire. In other words, she has a biological [wet panties] desire for pleasure because she FEELS the physical sensations of horniness, etc.)
NEEDS
A DECISION_BASED DESIRE – where the predominant driver is to fulfill a conscious desire – examples: to tell her friends a cool story, to prove to the guy she’s sexy, to get revenge on a cheating lover, etc.)
WANTS
Do you see the difference?
So when you look at this list, keep those 2 types in mind. Here it it.
1. I was attracted to the person
2. I wanted to experience the physical pleasure
3. It feels good
4. I wanted to show my affection to the person
5. I wanted to express my love for the person
6. I was sexually aroused and wanted the release
7. I was ‘‘horny’’
8. It’s fun
9. I realized I was in love
10. I was ‘‘in the heat of the moment’’
11. I wanted to please my partner
12. I desired emotional closeness (i.e., intimacy)
13. I wanted the pure pleasure
14. I wanted to achieve an orgasm
15. It’s exciting, adventurous
16. I wanted to feel connected to the person
17. The person’s physical appearance turned me on
18. It was a romantic setting
19. The person really desired me
20. The person made me feel sexy
21. The person caressed me
22. It seemed like the natural next step in my relationship
23. I wanted to become one with another person
24. It just happened
25. I wanted to increase the emotional bond by having sex
26. I wanted the experience
27. I wanted the adventure/excitement
28. The person had an attractive face
29. The person was a good kisser
30. I wanted to intensify my relationship
31. My hormones were out of control
32. I wanted to try out new sexual techniques or positions or positions
33. I wanted to feel loved
34. The person had a desirable body
35. I wanted to celebrate a birthday or anniversary or special
occasion
36. I wanted to communicate at a ‘‘deeper’’ level
37. I was curious about sex
38. It was a special occasion
39. The person was intelligent
40. I wanted to say ‘‘I’ve missed you’’
41. I wanted to keep my partner satisfied
42. I got ‘‘carried away’’
43. The opportunity presented itself
44. The person had a great sense of humor
45. I wanted to improve my sexual skills
46. I was curious about my sexual abilities I wanted to communicate at a ‘‘deeper’’ level
47. The person seemed self-confident
48. I wanted to make up after a fight
49. I was drunk
50. I was turned on by the sexual conversation