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PostPosted: Sat May 07, 2022 12:06 pm 
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Useless background story :lol: :
I was gonna write multiple threads "Who Asked This Question? Perspectives and Exercises"
1st post : Goals vs Adaptation (Processes / Systems / Values / Skills / Journey).
2nd post : Change vs Acceptance (Knowing yourself / Onions peeling / Surrendering, ...)
Then, don't know how I stumbled on this book, but I read it by curiosity and in my view no need anymore.
I HIGHLY recommend to start the book, it touches so many things talked about here.

Many details, many exercises / perspectives taken.
It talks about narcissism / personality and disorders, spiritual / material aspects of life, ACT, sex / love ...
So many a-ha moments / great quotes reading it the first time.

Summary from Amazon :
Quote:
When psychologist Scott Barry Kaufman first discovered Maslow's unfinished theory of transcendence, sprinkled throughout a cache of unpublished journals, lectures, and essays, he felt a deep resonance with his own work and life. In this groundbreaking book, Kaufman picks up where Maslow left off, unraveling the mysteries of his unfinished theory, and integrating these ideas with the latest research on attachment, connection, creativity, love, purpose and other building blocks of a life well lived.

Kaufman's new hierarchy of needs provides a roadmap for finding purpose and fulfillment--not by striving for money, success, or "happiness," but by becoming the best version of ourselves, or what Maslow called self-actualization. While self-actualization is often thought of as a purely individual pursuit, Maslow believed that the full realization of potential requires a merging between self and the world. We don't have to choose either self-development or self-sacrifice, but at the highest level of human potential we show a deep integration of both. Transcend reveals this level of human potential that connects us not only to our highest creative potential, but also to one another.

With never-before-published insights and new research findings, along with exercises and opportunities to gain insight into your own unique personality, this empowering book is a manual for self-analysis and nurturing a deeper connection not only with our highest potential but also with the rest of humanity.
He explains in the book how the pyramid of Maslow is a bastardized representation (not created by Maslow, but an intern if I recall) of his more complex / intricate philosophy.
He supplants it with a boat metaphor :
[ img ]

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"The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn."
Alvin Toffler


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PostPosted: Wed May 11, 2022 9:35 pm 
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Just finished my second reading of the book.
Definitely in my top 10 books ever. (Maybe even in Top 3 with DaoDeJing and Natural Farming. I'll create a thread soon.)

Love this book, as it reflects / expands upon so many things talked about here (Perpetual Motion, maximizing potential, being best friend, confidence + indifference, tapping subconscious, ...) said differently, backed by science.
Quote:
I have written this book to reinvigorate the wise, profound, and essentially human insights of humanistic psychology with the latest scientific findings from a wide range of fields—including positive psychology, social psychology, evolutionary psychology, clinical psychology, developmental psychology, personality psychology, organizational psychology, sociology, cybernetics, and neuroscience. The integration of a wide variety of perspectives is necessary for a more complete understanding of the full depths of human potential, as too much focus on a single perspective runs the risk of giving a distorted view of human nature. As Maslow said, “I suppose it is tempting, if the only tool you have is a hammer, to treat everything as if it were a nail.”
Adding what is the Appendix 2 of the book, The actual Growth Challenges.
There's a free pdf on their own websites : https://scottbarrykaufman.com/wp-conten ... lenges.pdf

In the book :
Quote:
One can choose to go back toward safety or forward toward growth. Growth must be chosen again and again; fear must be overcome again and again.
—Abraham Maslow

Congratulations! If you are reading this text, you have likely begun your own personal journey toward growth, integration, and transcendence. The growth challenges presented on the following pages are designed to usher you, providing prompts, activities, and thought experiments to foster your development toward becoming a whole person.

Each exercise accompanies the science found throughout the chapters of this book and builds on the previous challenges, so we suggest that you go through them in sequence.
Some challenges might require more of your time and attention than others, based on how each exercise resonates with you and your unique life circumstances.
We advise that you proceed with these exercises mindfully, consciously reserving judgment for yourself and any of your perceived shortcomings; this journey is about leaning into your whole self, capitalizing on what is working, and using those strengths to help you ascend your own hierarchy.
Feel free to take your time with each exercise, but in some instances you might mindfully decide that it’s better to move on to another exercise and return to a prior one when you are more ready.
Remember, life is not a video game, and human development is often a two-steps-forward, one-step-back contiguous dynamic.
Finally, we recommend that you keep a journal dedicated to reflecting on each challenge so that you can chart your journey.

We hope you remain on this brave path, choosing growth again and again. Good luck sailing!
Quote:
GROWTH CHALLENGE #1: SPOT YOUR LOPSIDED DEVELOPMENT
GROWTH CHALLENGE #2: EXPLORE YOUR DARK SIDE
GROWTH CHALLENGE #3: FACE YOUR FEARS
GROWTH CHALLENGE #4: GROW TOGETHER, CULTIVATE A SECURE RELATIONSHIP
GROWTH CHALLENGE #5: FOSTER A HIGH-QUALITY CONNECTION
GROWTH CHALLENGE #6: ACTIVE CONSTRUCTIVE RESPONDING
GROWTH CHALLENGE #7: PRACTICE HEALTHY ASSERTIVENESS
GROWTH CHALLENGE #8: UNPLUG
GROWTH CHALLENGE #9: DITCH PERFECT!
GROWTH CHALLENGE #10: CHALLENGE COGNITIVE DISTORTIONS
GROWTH CHALLENGE #11: BE SOCIALLY CURIOUS!
GROWTH CHALLENGE #12: TEST THE WATERS, EXPAND YOUR COMFORT ZONE, AND GROW FROM ADVERSITY
GROWTH CHALLENGE #13: EXERCISE LOVING-KINDNESS
GROWTH CHALLENGE #14: TREAT YOURSELF LIKE YOU WOULD TREAT A BEST FRIEND
GROWTH CHALLENGE #15: HARMONIZE YOUR IDENTITIES
GROWTH CHALLENGE #16: USE YOUR SIGNATURE STRENGTHS IN NEW WAYS
GROWTH CHALLENGE #17: WHAT’S YOUR IKIGAI?
GROWTH CHALLENGE #18: CREATE A PEAK EXPERIENCE
GROWTH CHALLENGE #19: PRACTICE SAVORING

In the pdf :
Quote:
PART 1:
Transcend! Course Growth Challenges
Positive Introductions..................................................... 3
Spot Your Lopsided Development................................. 4
Face Your Fears............................................................. 7
Foster a High-Quality Connection (using ACR)............. 9
Practice Healthy Assertiveness................................... 12
Challenge Cognitive Distortions................................... 14
Ditch Perfect!................................................................ 18
Explore Your Dark Side,
Embrace Post-Traumatic Growth................................ 19
Be Socially Curious!..................................................... 21
Being Love: Self, Others, World.................................. 22
Take the VIA Strengths Survey.................................... 26
What’s Your Ikigai?....................................................... 28
Create a Peak Experience & Live In The B-Realm..... 30

PART 2:
Additional Growth Challenges
Harmonize Your Identities............................................. 33
Create a Positive Portfolio............................................ 34
Three Good Things....................................................... 35
Grow Together, Cultivate a Secure Relationship.......... 37
Unplug Challenge......................................................... 38
Time Tracking................................................................ 39
Practice Your ABCs....................................................... 42
Creativity Challenge...................................................... 44
Practice Forgiveness.................................................... 46
Practice Acts of Kindness............................................. 49
Pleasure Vs. Philanthropy Experiment......................... 50
Develop a Personal Oath.............................................. 51
Practice Savoring.......................................................... 53
REVAMP Inventory....................................................... 55
Write a Gratitude Letter................................................. 57

_________________
"The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn."
Alvin Toffler


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PostPosted: Thu May 12, 2022 2:05 am 
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Thanks for this Golden

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PostPosted: Thu May 12, 2022 10:53 pm 
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Quote:
Maslow viewed the role of the teacher, therapist, and parent as horticulturists, whose task is to “enable people to become healthy and effective in their own style.”1 To Maslow, this meant that “we try to make a rose into a good rose, rather than seek to change roses into lilies. . . . It necessitates a pleasure in the self-actualization of a person who may be quite different from yourself. It even implies an ultimate respect and acknowledgement of the sacredness and uniqueness of each kind of person.”

_________________
In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 31, 2023 3:19 am 
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17) Ikigai 8-)

生き甲斐 or 生きがい is " reason for living " and " purpose in life "

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ikigai
Quote:
According to a study by Michiko Kumano, feeling ikigai as described
in Japanese usually means the feeling of accomplishment
and fulfillment that follows when people pursue their passions.

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