Natural Freedom

Hi Kidd

I'm about to turn 21 soon, and I've never gotten laid or had a girlfriend! This realization seriously made me frustrated, so I decided to post on here. What would you suggest for an average guy using your methods?

I mean, clearly, you're an attractive guy, so you have women all over you without you really having to do anything. I've read some of your success stories.. The attention and opportunities you get with women.. That stuff NEVER happens to me (an average dude). I don't have girls eyeing me, trying to get my attention, etc. Honestly, I can't even remember the last time a girl talked to me first or even made an effort to. It's like I'm invisible or something. The last time I got checked out by a girl was last year (this is usually a rare, once-a-year type of thing).

I've read through enough threads on here to know what people are probably going to say: "Stop caring so much, and work on yourself, the vibe of contentment, etc. etc." Dude, I've been doing that for the past several years, just focusing on my goals and doing what I have to do without worrying about girls. The opportunities just never came.. Other people might say that girls were probably giving me signs of interest and that I didn't notice. I'm pretty sure I would have noticed, considering that my observation skills have been sharpened throughout my life (due to the fact that I had to be highly and constantly aware of how my old man was feeling so that I wouldn't make a mistake and get the crap beaten out of me).

What am I supposed to do at this point? I'm too young to build up a solid clout. The best thing I can do is build up my front, which is what I've been doing. Any suggestions?

I'd almost guarantee that the 'one girl' who checked you out last year wasn't the only one...but more like the one girl that YOU were checking out that actually checked you out back.

You gotta understand...it's less about who YOU want...and more about who wants YOU.

I consider myself exceptional mentally but maaaaybe above average physically. I wasn't generally considered 'good looking' until I was about your age. Girls used to tell me I was ugly to my FACE. If that isn't happening to you, then you're already at a better starting point than I was. Ironically, almost immediately after I had 'given up' on women is when they started popping up all over the place.

I'm sure many of our members once considered (or still consider) themselves to be average. Many of them were virgins for much longer than you will probably be. But yet and still they are experiencing the kind of situations that they thought was once impossible...the kind of situations I describe that they once could barely believe.

All the answers are here. Start with the New Members section if you haven't already (how long have you been lurking?). You may benefit from 1 on 1 mentoring...I offer Skype sessions for very VERY reasonable rates, and the members that have Skype'd with me will tell you that they found it very beneficial. PM me if your interested in that avenue.

Bottom line tho is...once you are truly indifferent and not pretending to be...once you are no longer needy and not pretending NOT to be...THAT'S when the magic happens.

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EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING.

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!

soupman, I'm gonna list a few suggestions for you before Kidd gets in here because there's a few things you said that needs to be addressed.

Firstly, thinking that Kidd, or anyone that's "good with woman" is a god with them and has them crawling all over them is not true, trying to live up to that false standard will produce a ton of anxiety in you and make you feel shitty about yourself because it's validation through external means and you'll never be able to achieve that because it's simply a false ideal.

Sure, Kidd has girls that like him, as do I, as do a lot of guys who have it all on lockdown. However, there's a ton of girls that want nothing to do with him, or myself, etc... You can never have every girl wanting you, it's a fact of life, so don't believe the marketing bs of others that have a financial motive in the "industry".
No matter who you are, you're going to have a few who want you, some on the fence, and most aren't interested for various reasons. Many girls want to blow Johnny Deep, and many think he's old and creepy, get it?

Also, if you haven't gotten laid yet then I assume you haven't socialized around girls a lot, gone to parties, etc..

Read what you need to here, pimposophies, the manipulated man, and then get out and socialize (Bars, parties, just say hi to girls when you're out and about and make comments about the environment you're in and if they're interested have a conversation) so you get desensitized to dealing with girls and every time something happens like a girl shows interest, or you make-out with a chick, or have sex it will become part of your reality. Making something a part of your reality where it seemed impossible before is one of the secrets to success.

Keep working on your clout, you're young, you have TONS of time.

Don't be afraid to make mistakes, Kidd's made a ton in his early days, so have I...shit most of us have ran experiments where we intentionally fuck up with girls (Showing too much interest, things like that). After a million fuck ups the patterns will be internalized in you and you'll be a rock. But since you're just starting out remember you're going to do stupid shit and blow it with hundreds of girls, really remember that, I've done it and it's the best thing that can happen to you so don't feel bad about it (They always come back a few years later anyway and when they see the knew you they'll be on your tip again).

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The honey doesn't chase the bee.

A wise man once said "I find that a duck's opinion of me is influenced by whether or not I have bread."

You're SO lucky I got in first, ShitRhinocerus.

_________________
EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING.

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!

Corey and Trevor, 50 fuck'n feet!

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The honey doesn't chase the bee.

A wise man once said "I find that a duck's opinion of me is influenced by whether or not I have bread."

Also, finding suitable environment may help too - Since I like anime and games, I hang around the otaku community in my country A LOT (I'm going to be 23) - And I get girls almost exlusively from there. So finding your own "place" or "niche" like this may be beneficial
+ Everything these bros said

Absolutely!

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The honey doesn't chase the bee.

A wise man once said "I find that a duck's opinion of me is influenced by whether or not I have bread."

I said it especially if you don't like going to clubs - I never really enjoyed that, and felt like I should for some time, so I'd like to spare you that

Do what you feel is needed to get laid so you can see it's really not a big deal. Then learn to convey potential before it's actualized. It can still be as effective when coming from the right place.

Also eliminate that I'm too young belief, it's just an excuse.

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"The heart is deep beyond all things, and it is the man. Even so, who can know him."

In my country, there's this 11year old bro who wanted to make moneys for new computer so he can play games etc.
Parents said no, he developed an idea to make dried apple-slices from apples they got in their garden and sell them.
His father set him a facebook page, for the friends to join and order, didn't expect anybody to take it seriously.
Now the page has 13 800+ fans and he is making daily orders, which get shipped by mail service - He raised the money for the pc (But one of our biggest E-shops with PC stuff just gave him one for free, thats bulshit, they should have give him a discount or something, but that's another story).
He's got a new idea he's working on with his dad and some other bros, he's gonna do it soon so I'm excited for that lol

But you get the point, this 11 year bro just pretty much started to build his cloud at 11

Did you face that weakling yet?

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♫♫♩♫‿◦

Damnit you incomprehensible genius. That's the elephant in the room. You beat me to it.
You also beat me to the first and most important thing.

Dude, I would say do everything in your power to get a nut like Caliboy.

If you live in the United States

If you have a cell phone and a car then I suggest you hit up what are called chatlines. Use protection, seriously. Those women rotate on and off those chatlines like clockwork. I'm not telling you to call some line to talk about sex. If you're paying to talk to some woman then you're doing it wrong. A lot of chatlines have a 60 minutes of free phone time for you to talk to real women located in your area.

Do that. Also, don't discriminate on age, weight, or race if it's in your mental capabilities right now to do otherwise. That will keep you from getting laid. This is by far the easiest and fastest way to get laid. It only took me calling one and I repeat one chatline to get my nut off. The woman was ass ugly, but the pussy was tight as a crawl space.

Chat with them for about two minutes when you connect with them live and tell them to text you and tell them your number. Don't ask. Also, don't ask for their number. If they tell you to take theirs then do so. Be firm. Tell them you want to watch a movie and have drinks.

I know and understand your frustration at being a late bloomer, but you have come to the right place.

That Big Demon

Notice what Jared pointed to earlier. Your observation skills are not as sharp as you think. You really may just have one big demon that's eating you up, and it probably stems from getting the crap beat out of you by your old man.

Face that. Face him. like a man.

You were aware for protection. You were not aware for the point of just observing. There is a difference.

One of the main reasons why you have not noticed women looking at you may be because you still have the lens of protection over your eyes.

You may not think deep down inside, change think to feel, that anyone can have deep feelings for you.

That statement of yours about not getting beaten is very telling. You don't want to make a mistake. Consequently, your lens of protection tells you not to act on anything. If you're conditioned not to act on anything like I was earlier before I started blooming then you won't see anything because your filter shuts it out from your view.

Agreed. The fact that you don't think that girls find you attractive to me is indicative of deeper things going on with your confidence. If you have an insecure vibe and see the world through an insecure lens, then of course you're going to think that nobody wants you.

Also the fact that you felt compelled to just throw in that little mention as an "aside" to me indicates that these two things are wrapped up together. In other words, bro - you got daddy issues.

I would recommend delving into this and exploring it fully. Not because it will get you women, but because it probably impacts your life in many (all?) areas.

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"The society gives you a map; I give you only freedom. The society gives you character, I give you only consciousness. The society teaches you to live a conformist life ... I give you an invitation to go on an adventure." - Osho

I second this

_________________
EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING.

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!

Suggestions? Yeah; Read it all again, more carefully this time. I'm almost certain that Kidd mentions that potential in motion is as attractive to a Women as potential realised. They like to feel that they were part of the process. That in some way you needed them to help you fullfill that potential, whatever it was.

You aren't too young to start building your clout. The important thing to remember is that you're building your clout for your own satisfaction and needs, not theirs, and not because it's going to get you laid. It won't. Clout does not necessarily mean earning 6 figure sums per year either, so open your mind to what it can mean.

Figure out what you do well, your qualities. If you need to feel what it's like to get laid, do what you have to. Or rather, focus on yourself and let it happen in due time.

Mostly, rejoice that you found this forum at a young age. If I had found this at 21.....well, things wouldn't have been any easier, because it's a difficult path to undertake. Think about that.

Leo, digging your new signature.

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"The society gives you a map; I give you only freedom. The society gives you character, I give you only consciousness. The society teaches you to live a conformist life ... I give you an invitation to go on an adventure." - Osho

I'm so busy but welcome soupman,

everything was already said.. just worth emphasizing-
Star_Above also put it very nicely here:

viewtopic.php?p=32511#p32511
life is like a funny movie sometimes

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"a sniper is the worst romancer, he never makes the first move"

This article below has given me much more balanced perspective on the whole looks thing....

http://www.goodlookingloser.com/2013/12 ... ex-part-1/

Basically, lose body fat as you are always going to look better with less fat, try to eat a healthy diet, and let the rest go. I'm sure you're better looking than you think - we are all our own worst critics.

Oh, and women wear makeup. It can make a HUGE difference.

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"Truth is not something that can be truly and deeply understood by having it spoon-fed to you." - Adyashanti

Just take a venture to your nearest nightclub, guarantee there's at least a couple neighbourhood cougars you haven't noticed because your too busy focusing on the the 19-20 year old women in there.

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"The heart is deep beyond all things, and it is the man. Even so, who can know him."

MY POINT EXACTLY

_________________
EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING.

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!