Natural Freedom

Anyone else dig them?

A girl I'm currently seeing has explicitly told me 2 or 3 times that she is "very independent". Funny thing, I am actually very independent.

MIRROR

I actually like this girl, and not in the sympish needy way. I like her because I enjoy myself just as much when I am with her than when I am alone <-- and I truly understand what that statement means now.

I think part of the reason for this is because we are both independent. We are both providing the space one another needs and it's working. It really is magnificent to be able to observe such phenomena in my own relationships now; I am marveled at the naturalness of it all.

Now I'm realizing that most of the girls I have been really attracted to have been independent. I also realize why I have been doing it wrong for a long time with these types of girls.

They become attracted to me because I am also independent and don't show/have much interest in the beginning.

Once I get to know them a bit, I realize I like them and I change my behaviors in order to keep them.

But they were attracted to my original behaviors, so obviously when I act like I think I should act, it is fake and not what they were attracted to.

Finish how you start of course. Furthermore, be aware of positive/negative feedback --> otherwise known as OBSERVATION.

So what kind of mind shift needs to occur...?

Realizing that wants are fine, but they are not needs. Meaning, you have to be able to picture your life without something you want, and realize that not only is that situation one in which a person should be totally content, but also realize that a life without any particular want (a girl, a goal, a material item, etc.) is likely possibly.

Anyway, I am finding this shift has occurred within myself and this is why I am able to experience intimacy and passion with this girl (and others before her), without becoming completely attached or changing my ways.

So, back to the topic, what do you guys think of independent women?
Are you more or less attracted to them?
What do you think attracts them?
What types of perks come from being with them?

I think that someone who has to constantly tell you how independent they are are usually anything BUT.

Watch your six.

_________________
EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING.

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!

Yeah, I agree. How many men talk how how independent they are?

The millisecond a girl starts talking about being strong and independent I just want to run lol.

_________________
"The heart is deep beyond all things, and it is the man. Even so, who can know him."

Beat me to it.

You can read "independent" as "bitch" or "gold digger" a lot of times. Either way, few good things come of those type of women. Feminism has played a great role in developing the "independent" moniker for women to wield.

It's a big "Buyer Beware" sign. When the waves get rough the storm is coming.

Well she doesn't always talk about how strong and independent she is...

She has just mentioned a couple times that she likes to be able to do things herself and she doesn't like to rely on others to get stuff done.

She knows what she wants. She doesn't text all the time like other girls, she just texts me when she wants to kick it.

I see what you guys are saying but I think she really means it when she claims she's independent.

She has mentioned to me how her parents had kids really young and how they didn't really know how to be parents; she doesn't seem to carry tons of baggage from this like one would expect. I feel like the independent thing stems from having to look out for herself from an early age. Furthermore, she's not a social leech. At parties, I can leave her alone and talk to other friends/girls and she won't smother me for attention or complain about me talking to other people...but she will find me at the end of the night

Anyway, I've never experienced a girl like this before so it is refreshing for me. I'm not saying she is an x-factor by any means, I'm just saying I enjoy girls like this and she has showed me something about myself. I very much appreciate the girls who do not hound me for attention or turn to me to fulfill all their needs. She gives me space and I give her space - it works.

She could stop hitting me up tomorrow and it wouldn't be no thang. At least I've learned about myself, allowed myself to share intimacy, and at the very least made a friend.

If my gut is right, then I'll be happy because of the above sentence

If you guys, Kidd, Altair, and Slim, are right, then my attraction for this girl will be gone anyways.

Plus, I've got other, more important things going on in my life. Letting go of a situation like this is not too difficult for me anymore

Well she doesn't always talk about how strong and independent she is...

She has just mentioned a couple times that she likes to be able to do things herself and she doesn't like to rely on others to get stuff done.

She knows what she wants. She doesn't text all the time like other girls, she just texts me when she wants to kick it.

I see what you guys are saying but I think she really means it when she claims she's independent.

She has mentioned to me how her parents had kids really young and how they didn't really know how to be parents; she doesn't seem to carry tons of baggage from this like one would expect. I feel like the independent thing stems from having to look out for herself from an early age. Furthermore, she's not a social leech. At parties, I can leave her alone and talk to other friends/girls and she won't smother me for attention or complain about me talking to other people...but she will find me at the end of the night

Anyway, I've never experienced a girl like this before so it is refreshing for me. I'm not saying she is an x-factor by any means, I'm just saying I enjoy girls like this and she has showed me something about myself. I very much appreciate the girls who do not hound me for attention or turn to me to fulfill all their needs. She gives me space and I give her space - it works.

She could stop hitting me up tomorrow and it wouldn't be no thang. At least I've learned about myself, allowed myself to share intimacy, and at the very least made a friend.

If my gut is right, then I'll be happy because of the above sentence

If you guys, Kidd, Altair, and Slim, are right, then my attraction for this girl will be gone anyways.

Plus, I've got other, more important things going on in my life. Letting go of a situation like this is not too difficult for me anymore

Yeah, you will be fine. You really don't have anything to lose but your time and you were gonna spend that anyways.

_________________
"The heart is deep beyond all things, and it is the man. Even so, who can know him."

Kinda defensive, BRAH

_________________
EVERYTHING in life is conditional...EVERYTHING.

Pimposophy Revisited is now finally available on Amazon in all territories!

I was just being honest...

I know you're wiser than I, but at the same time I'm the one experiencing this stuff in real-time so I figured I'd share some more details.

Back to my original point (it's not all about me ya know ), have you guys ever experienced independent women? Maybe they are not the ones who flat-out say "I'm independent". If so, then how do you know they are independent?

I'd assume they are the type of girls who wouldn't take a simp for a ride (and his cash). I would also assume they are girls who know what they want and only turn to others when they realize it is something they can't give themselves (quite contrary to the independent MAN).

If any of you guys have seen the movie Up in the Air, starring George Clooney, the supporting character Alex (played by Vera Farmiga, older woman) is what I picture when I think of an independent woman http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dw6VE8jjP-0 .

That's a great movie btw, many insights into the matrix if you've got your eyes and ears open.

I find it interesting that these two sentences were said one after the other.

_________________
In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.

The last woman I was seeing says that kinda stuff all the time but there are inconsistencies with her actions which is to be expected.

Women never know what they want, really. Like the other said if they have to point that out then run for the hills.

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"Simply put, you being in her life is a BLESSING. Her wronging you in any way is her own self-inflicted CURSE, and if she does wrong you, then let the punishment fit the crime. Her life will absolutely SUCK without you."

This.

_________________
The honey doesn't chase the bee.

A wise man once said "I find that a duck's opinion of me is influenced by whether or not I have bread."