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Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
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Author:  Alchemist [ Sun Jun 27, 2010 12:13 am ]
Post subject:  Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
Mk.

I indirectly asked out a friend of mine, different person, older woman too though and she's nice!! I didn't want to use the words "I want to take you out on a date". :shock: so I was like non-nonchalantly "let's get a coffee or something" and she was like "yeah definitely".

We met was at a social event about a year ago and she had her eyes locked on me like a serious staredown.....anyways today she's all touching me and tickling me (more than usual) so I figured since we've developed a friendship and she's comfortable then it's time to test the waters.

She put herself a reminder for next weekend so she'll get in touch with me when she knows for sure if she's free, she did it on the phone and showed me as she was doing it to make sure, I'm always busy regardless so unlike the zan days I won't be waiting by the phone, and when we do get together it will be a good time, she said something like "we'll have to do something more interesting than watch football" ;) cuz that's what we were doing tonight with a group so I was like alright 8-) but inside I'm like. :twisted: :mrgreen:

I want to plant the seed in her mind that there's potential to take it further (maybe I already have, you tell me), I'm comfortable with this because it won't a blind-date situation since we know each other plus I framed it as both of us doing something, she agreed, and it's not strictly a 'date', no pressure on me.

Plus I'm setting this up as a test to see how far she would take it, all suggestions welcome as to how you would handle this situation.

I'm set on dropping this barrier guys, this is something I have not done before.
Author:  peregrinus [ Sun Jun 27, 2010 12:50 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
create wrote:
so I was like non-nonchalantly "let's get a coffee or something" and she was like "yeah definitely".
create wrote:
she had her eyes locked on me like a serious staredown
create wrote:
she's all touching me and tickling me (more than usual)
create wrote:
She put herself a reminder for next weekend so she'll get in touch with me when she knows for sure if she's free, she did it on the phone and showed me as she was doing it to make sure
create wrote:
she said something like "we'll have to do something more interesting than watch football" ;)
Read those again carefully, then tell me what you think?
Same as before, If I had said these to you, what would you say to me?
Quote:
I want to plant the seed in her mind that there's potential to take it further
Really?

Personally I think you are wasting your time ;)

One seed per pot is usually enough.
Author:  The Kidd!! [ Sun Jun 27, 2010 1:15 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
Quote:
One seed per pot is usually enough.
THIS...then just check on it occasionally and water as needed. 8-)
Author:  Alchemist [ Sun Jun 27, 2010 8:38 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
Ok Pere, as another person, I'd say it's clear there's some interest there and even a hint that she might want to take it further.

Funny enough, after typing that I just got an e-mail from her, saying she did have something on her schedule but can't make those events so she is free and it just depends what we do if she doesn't have work, in which case she suggested we do a movie and takeout at her place. :shock: :mrgreen:

I'm thinkin, maybe it isn't a coincidence that she can't make those events in which case would be effing sweet, but then I remember what you guys told me: there is no such thing as a coincidence.

One seed, duly noted guys. 8-)

Btw nice avatar Kidd. :D
Author:  peregrinus [ Sun Jun 27, 2010 11:04 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
create wrote:
Ok Pere, as another person, I'd say it's clear there's some interest there and even a hint that she might want to take it further.
*Might* ? *Hint* ?
Oh come on create, together with the next comment, I feel you are fooling yourself, this one:
create wrote:
she suggested we do a movie and takeout at her place. :shock: :mrgreen:
Think about this create... To make it clear to you, she has suggested a meeting at HER place.
No people around, just you two.
Somewhere where SHE will be comfortable and relaxed already.
SHE IS ISOLATING YOU AND HER, for a period of time beyond a coffee meeting (what you suggested) - she is doing the work for you :)

Takeout and movie, so you will both be relaxed, giving you about 2 hours minimum together, close in proximity (sitting on couch or similar), a distraction (the movie), something that will stir her emotions up (movie), without other people around (no societal pressure), plenty of chances for her to touch you more and snuggle up to you.

Do you think she would do this if she did not already feel comfortable with you and want to explore things further? really think about this one.
create wrote:
I'm thinkin, maybe it isn't a coincidence that she can't make those events in which case would be effing sweet, but then I remember what you guys told me: there is no such thing as a coincidence.

One seed, duly noted guys. 8-)
The seed is there, it is sprouting already, she is just waiting for you to catch onto the fact that it is already there and notice it.
Author:  The Kidd!! [ Sun Jun 27, 2010 3:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
Aw man Create, you are so money in this situation it's making MY dick hard. :lol:

Like my cousin always tells me, it is always up to me what happens. Whether I fuck a chick or not, ultimately it is because either I wanted to or didn't want to. All you really have to do at this point is just show up and go with the flow.

Oh, and leave the self doubt at home on this trip...the sign above her door says, "Confident men ONLY." 8-)
Author:  TheModernLibertine [ Sun Jun 27, 2010 9:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
If you dont push her away then she will rape, I guarantee it. ;)
Author:  Alchemist [ Mon Jun 28, 2010 10:14 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
The Kidd!! wrote:
Aw man Create, you are so money in this situation it's making MY dick hard. :lol:

Like my cousin always tells me, it is always up to me what happens. Whether I fuck a chick or not, ultimately it is because either I wanted to or didn't want to. All you really have to do at this point is just show up and go with the flow.

Oh, and leave the self doubt at home on this trip...the sign above her door says, "Confident men ONLY." 8-)
My work for this week is to remove all doubt and accept that it's in the bag, it's in the mothafuckin bag. :o
Author:  peregrinus [ Tue Jun 29, 2010 12:19 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
TheModernLibertine wrote:
If you dont push her away then she will rape, I guarantee it. ;)
This brought back some good memories Libertine, thank you for that :)
create wrote:
My work for this week is to remove all doubt and accept that it's in the bag, it's in the mothafuckin bag. :o
As Libertine and Kidd said, the only way this will stop is if you stop it.

Do not resist her, she has a plan, flow with it.
(Although this may seem contrary advice, it is not, she is still the response to your stimulus)

Her moving things forward and escalating on you is in response to your stimulus, you are leading by being you, she is following by moving things to a place where she is more available to you.
Author:  Alchemist [ Tue Jun 29, 2010 7:10 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
peregrinus wrote:
TheModernLibertine wrote:
If you dont push her away then she will rape, I guarantee it. ;)
This brought back some good memories Libertine, thank you for that :)
create wrote:
My work for this week is to remove all doubt and accept that it's in the bag, it's in the mothafuckin bag. :o
As Libertine and Kidd said, the only way this will stop is if you stop it.

Do not resist her, she has a plan, flow with it.
(Although this may seem contrary advice, it is not, she is still the response to your stimulus)

Her moving things forward and escalating on you is in response to your stimulus, you are leading by being you, she is following by moving things to a place where she is more available to you.
I have no intention of stopping it, she's on the ball and I barely did anything so I must be doing something right :lol:, I'm thinking also now that maybe she's been thinkin about gettin together with me the whole time and was just waiting for me to make a little push in her direction.
Author:  The Kidd!! [ Tue Jun 29, 2010 7:27 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
create wrote:
peregrinus wrote:
TheModernLibertine wrote:
If you dont push her away then she will rape, I guarantee it. ;)
This brought back some good memories Libertine, thank you for that :)
create wrote:
My work for this week is to remove all doubt and accept that it's in the bag, it's in the mothafuckin bag. :o
As Libertine and Kidd said, the only way this will stop is if you stop it.

Do not resist her, she has a plan, flow with it.
(Although this may seem contrary advice, it is not, she is still the response to your stimulus)

Her moving things forward and escalating on you is in response to your stimulus, you are leading by being you, she is following by moving things to a place where she is more available to you.
I have no intention of stopping it, she's on the ball and I barely did anything so I must be doing something right :lol:, I'm thinking also now that maybe she's been thinkin about gettin together with me the whole time and was just waiting for me to make a little push in her direction.
Ya think? :mrgreen:
Author:  peregrinus [ Wed Jun 30, 2010 12:50 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
create wrote:
I have no intention of stopping it, she's on the ball and I barely did anything so I must be doing something right :lol:, I'm thinking also now that maybe she's been thinkin about gettin together with me the whole time and was just waiting for me to make a little push in her direction.
<doing best impression of a frustrated girlie>
What do I have to do to get him to notice me!!!!

Sheesh, guys just don't get it, I was practically screaming at him and he didn't notice at all.
What do I have to do, invite him over, parade around half naked and throw myself at him!

It would be so much easier if guys could read us better, they seem so dense
</doing best impression of a frustrated girlie>
Author:  Alchemist [ Wed Jun 30, 2010 8:55 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
To be fair dude reading a woman correctly best comes from experience, and I've so so little experience I generally don't/didn't know what to look for, I'm only now beginning to understand what you guys are telling me.

You can't expect a dude who's never seen a sign to know what it is, the more I see them the clearer it becomes, it's nice when a girl helps a brother out by being overt. :mrgreen:

The 'instant-sex' media discourages this awareness of subtle signals but fuckit, I'm not using that as an excuse anymore.
Author:  TheModernLibertine [ Wed Jun 30, 2010 11:47 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Throwing the ball then stealing it back.
Instant sex media destroys guys ability to pick up the subtleness that is a woman. You're right Create. You're doing a good job and no matter what you will continue to get better.
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