For what it is worth - I only give my phone #, I almost never initiate contact in terms of stuff like txting, in person I never do 'pickup lines' or any of that BS.. I will talk to people socially and address everyone more or less the same way *at first* - cordial, not outwardly showing interest unless it is shown etc. etc.
also, I am not some expert player or anything and that has never been my intention, but I am basically referring to reading the energy, being able to tell if the vibe is there and so on.. you have to be able to direct the energy the way you want to go. In my experience it can be as simple as your vibe, eye contact, simple physical contact, or a single statement that puts things on the table. Basically there needs to be some bridge between i'm being cool/chill, there's a vibe with the girl, now we get together. Yes some will be very aggressive and instigate it physically or verbally, but others will basically put it all out there energetically... all you need to do is something very simple and if you don't it just never happens, and there is no reason not to at that point.. if they are giving you an open layup just take it, they don't have to grab the ball from your hand and dunk it into their own basket.
There's cool / chill / indifferent guy who seems completely uninterested to the point where I have no chance with him and will very well get rejected if I do anything, and then there's cool / chill / indifferent guy where I can tell it is 'on the table' at least a little bit.. there's potential to chase or tension.. almost like there is space in both scenarios but there is some level of invitation to fill it or clue that it's going to be at least an adventure to fill it. This is also not something you have to "do" per se but seems to be a natural aspect of actually being chilled out vs TRYING to be.
In my experience you also shoot yourself in the foot if you have any special thoughts in your head like "stepping up" to a girl - it's just another human being in the room and if you want to speak you speak and be who you are. As soon as you put rules that you can't speak to a woman first or something you are just putting yourself in another limiting and unnatural box.
Again, this is speaking to my past experience and other guys i've known who have gone to the other extreme of doing *nothing,* even when girls are giving obvious signs of interest. There's also the "i'm getting signs of interest now" or girls are checking me out, my vibe is different etc but then nothing happens. There is still no step 2 of how you are actually then getting together and there is no real addressing of it.
This is miles away from saying it's free reign to be a dancing monkey or start chasing girls - but once the vibe is there or once you are being chased (which can be subtle) there's some intermediary step obviously and that requires something on your end, and a level of finesse. Also if you a travel a LOT like I do this can't always be some thing about building tension over time etc which I am not interested in even if i'm not traveling because it is unnecessary.
Interested to hear feedback / clarifications / wtf's from the more experienced