Natural Freedom

There is a lot on my mind...and I'm rather drunk as I post this

Keeping that in mind, I will try to keep this organized and will only post somethings to keep myself from rambling lol

I noticed a lot of things tonight and made some really deep insights I would like to share and if you guys have anything to say or disagree about my points please explain how and why you think that

- went to the bar with my bf's gf orginally he wasn't going to come but when he thought his gf was going to come alone with me he came at the last minute like the cab was already at the house lol.

-she confided some stuff about him in me

-we go the bar, I proceed to get really really drunk

- logical mind kicks into full gear

- I'm outside and chilling with some people and we're talking about virgins and this one girl is like your not a virgin to this one guy I know and I'm like I am legit. And she was like no your not so I asked her how she could tell. And she said your smile. Your def not. We talk for a bit nothing happened.

-I run into the group of guys i met the other day, I was feeling awesome and instead of being the kinda new guy outsider suddenly I'm the center of the group, I'm kinda loose with my cash when I'm drunk lol so I buy everyone a round the one guy I worked with his gf was like come with me we're getting you some. We went outside and we're having a smoke and she says what do you want a blond or brunette? And I said doesn't matter I'm not picky. Not when it comes to hair colour. And she said well what do you want bang or love? And I said bang so she said blonde. And I asked her why she would say that she said all guys that want to bang want blonds they fall in love with brunettes. And that guys confide things in her that are more personal then she feels she should know. But 'whatever'
She also told me guys are dumb and do whatever they're told and looked at me and I said "not this guy". She looks at me and analyzes the group dynamic she said that girl is hot but wants to fuck that guy so fuck that and that girl doesn't want anything to do with that guy so that's whats up. She walked over and starts talking to that girl. That guy thats trying to pick up that girl befriends me etc then talk I peg him as a community guy he talks to the girl thats winging for me. Tries to establish frame dominance from a beta mindset. There was multi-level thinking as the converation was battled out each trying to prove they could think deeper. It was fascinating

-I ask her what she said to that girl she said "I told her you had a huge cock" haha

-I danced with a few different girls nothing came of it, I'm not angry about it its more like a puzzle piece i cannot quite figure out. Can you guys help me?

-Girls I don't know seem to be confiding more secrets in me.

- I have self-belief and money and high value in any situation I come across. There's no need for this coldness, why must these games be played they seem so pointless. I can just buy hookers for much less headache, and investment of my time which is better spent on other things.

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"The heart is deep beyond all things, and it is the man. Even so, who can know him."

About your last statement, go buy hookers and see how your dick and wallet feel in the morning.

Also, from what I can tell these girls aren't confiding anything deep or of importance to you.

You're a little less logical than you think when you're drunk.

I think you're wrapped up in what other people think of you. I don't know to tell you to fix this.

Personally, I would take note of how much ass I'm getting from my social group versus how much work

that I'm putting in along with noting how often my friends invite me out. If both of these numbers are

low see how you feel afterwards. If you feel bad then you're wrapped up in what people think. If

you feel normal then you're not.

Hmm thanks man, that rings pretty true. I don't feel down or angry just puzzled. Some of the confiding no, I left out anything significant.

It's pretty even in terms, out inviting people and getting invited. Same with buy rounds, too there's always that one person that doesn't want to buy anything so whatever I'll buy a round and someone will buy the next. It's good like that.

_________________
"The heart is deep beyond all things, and it is the man. Even so, who can know him."