Natural Freedom

Hi´ll
I have been a guest of this forum for nearly half a year now and decided to become a member. I am 36 years old and I live in southern Europe where a lot of pepole come for holidays. I read some PUA stuff over last few years and what I have read here have shown me how it was sabotaging my life. Through here I discovered Patrice O´Neal, both phillip shows and that completely new to me perspective and attitude that predominates this site.
I live with one woman for 15 years now and I have 2 kids and I was not very happy (hence my dabbing in PUA) but since I got here things started changing rapidly. I was always waiting for sex with my "wife" until she wanted it but now things are different. She sexes me up almost every day as if she was afraid that I am gonna get it somwhere else if she doesn´t and that she might loose me.. It should be to no surprise that I find the stuff I read here very empowering. It helped me to recognize my value as a man and to know myself a little better and therefore make my girlfriend understand it.
I am sure there is still a long way ahead for me. I would like to contribute too but I think I still got more to learn than to teach. I registered cause I want to further speed up my growth and to let you all know that I finally found the place that resonates with me.
cheers
Rider

_________________
To thine self always be true

And we are happy you found this place

Welcome, etc
Patrice is the best

So you are not married, just living together and having kids ? That's cool, also how she's afraid of losing you suddenly.. Grats on the change of situation

Hi mate,
Could you please elaborate more on that? what exactly changed in your behaviour?

_________________
Laying on the floor in a pool of blood and cum
My demons lay beside as I kiss them one by one
Then on that day I met a force that nothing will compare
I was born the son of evil when I fuck the devil there!

Bravo Rider

_________________
In building a statue, a sculptor doesn't keep adding clay to his subject.He keeps chiseling away at the inessentials until the truth of its creation is revealed without obstructions. Perfection is not when there is no more to add,but no more to take away.

You make me feel welcome. Thanks.
Answering this question is a long post but I will try to keep it as short as I can. I believe it was few things working together. I read "Manipulated Man" and it made me angry for some time but it also made me realize what I bring into the table. Once I realized that I have done my part correctly I knew I don´t want to live with someone who doesn´t want to do their share. I don´t say she was a bad mother but rather that she was not such a good wife. I was ready to take the L on that. That translated in a behaviour.
I also took more control. I open those pickle jars. There are things that I just don´t expect her to do and do it myself.. like check why the car is not working to give an example. I just let my protective instinct do its job here.
What I also did was to split up our common wallet. Now I make my money and she makes hers. And guess what? She has 2 jobs now... and likes them both. I still earn more so I feed them all, but clothe only my children and myself and don´t sponsor any activities of hers. I will lend her money if she really needs but I will expect it back.
Last quick thing that comes to my mind: in bed I do more of what I wanna do and not worry as much weather it is something she likes or not. Its better this way. Its stops me from being overcautious. I don´t treat her specially nice after also, just so she doesn´t get any ideas that she can make me break my rules by means of pussy control. Also if she turns down my dick I make her wait for it next time she wants it even if its hard for me.
There you have it.
cheers all

_________________
To thine self always be true

Nice Rider. Way to start taking control. I'm sure you faced push-back on those decisions (like deciding to split up your finances), but going through with them anyway was a big step.
That to me is one of the big keys. Realizing that there is a line at which you are willing to walk away, no matter how negative it seems the consequences are. See my signature...

_________________
"The society gives you a map; I give you only freedom. The society gives you character, I give you only consciousness. The society teaches you to live a conformist life ... I give you an invitation to go on an adventure." - Osho

Hi Rider, glad to be of any help

I'll reiterate that http://www.youtube.com/user/CultOfBlack ... eos?view=0 is currently selecting all relevant black philip topics on his O&A appearances.

Other than that, Marquee Value was on your side, you helped it immensely, BRAVO

_________________
"The illiterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but those who cannot learn, unlearn, and relearn."
Alvin Toffler